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Fun&Phillophisy

Anything goes... just keep it clean.
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Craig
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Fun&Phillophisy

Post by Craig »

You have to see if its Phillophisy or a joke
Wise chinese man say "Goto bed with itchy bum, wakeup with brown finger"
Which?
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Mr Sleep
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Post by Mr Sleep »

How come are they spelt differently Craig?

What are you suggesting, some kind of homeless outreach program?
I'd have to get drunk every night and talk about virility...And those Pink elephants I'd see.
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fable
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Post by fable »

Why either, rather than both?
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.
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Craig
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Post by Craig »

dunno
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fable
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Post by fable »

Well, then, there you are. :)
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Mr Sleep
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Post by Mr Sleep »

Did anyone get my joke or was i being to literal? :)
I'd have to get drunk every night and talk about virility...And those Pink elephants I'd see.
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fable
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Post by fable »

I got it. I can't speak for Craig, though, particularly since we don't share a common language. ;)

(Sorry, Craig!) :D
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Post by Mr Sleep »

At least someone did, thanks Fable :)
I'd have to get drunk every night and talk about virility...And those Pink elephants I'd see.
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Vehemence
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Post by Vehemence »

Originally posted by Mr Sleep:
<STRONG>Did anyone get my joke or was i being to literal? :) </STRONG>
*Scratches head in bafflement* :D

Type slower coz I can't read fast ;) :D
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
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Mr Sleep
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Post by Mr Sleep »

Originally posted by Mr Sleep:
<STRONG>How come are they spelt differently Craig?

What are you suggesting, some kind of homeless outreach program?</STRONG>
Homeless outreach, bum, get it? :) :D
I'd have to get drunk every night and talk about virility...And those Pink elephants I'd see.
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Vehemence
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Post by Vehemence »

Originally posted by Mr Sleep:
<STRONG>Homeless outreach, bum, get it? :) :D </STRONG>
:rolleyes: Get what? :rolleyes:

*Scratches head in bafflement some more* :D :P

Just kidding sleep... I get it.. no really I do! :)
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
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Mr Sleep
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Post by Mr Sleep »

Good i was starting to think it might actually be funny :D :D
I'd have to get drunk every night and talk about virility...And those Pink elephants I'd see.
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Craig
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Post by Craig »

Dunno about the spelling
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Post by cheesemage »

just spamming..............
He is back and in 3-d!
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Post by KidD01 »

Now what do you all think about this :
"If you want to be threated as an adult, do what your mother says !"
:D :D

[ 06-11-2001: Message edited by: KidD01 ]
I'm not dead yet :D :p :cool:
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Post by KidD01 »

Homer Simpson Words of Wisdom

Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose...it's how drunk you get.
------
Oh, yeah, what are you gonna do? Release the dogs? Or the bees? Or the dogs with bees in their mouth and when they bark, they shoot bees at you?
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Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably.
The lesson is, never try.
------
It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.
------
Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No!
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal!
Homer: Heh heh heh... ooh... yeah... right, Lisa. A wonderful... magical animal.
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Marge: Do you want your son to be Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, or a sleazy male stripper?
Homer: Can't he be both, like the late Earl Warren?
Marge: Earl Warren was never a stripper!
Homer: Oh, now who's being naive?
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Homer: But every time I learn something new, it pushes out something old! Remember that time I took a home wine-making course and forgot how to drive?
Marge: That's because you were drunk!
Homer: And how!
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Oh, Lisa, you and your stories: Bart's a vampire, beer kills brain cells. Now let's go back to that...building...thingie... where our beds and TV... is.
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Operator! Give me the number for 911!
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Lenny: Hey, Homer? What do I tell the boss?
Homer: Tell him I'm going to the back seat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes!
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Big brother representative: Now, Mr. Simpson, may I ask why you're here?
Homer's brain: Don't say revenge. Don't say revenge.
Homer: Ummm... revenge?
Homer's brain: Okay, that's it. I'm outta here.
(step step step step step...slam)
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Homer: Okay, brain. You don't like me, and I don't like you, but let's get through this thing and then I can continue killing you with beer.
Homer's Brain: It's a deal!
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Homer: But Marge! I was a political prisoner!
Marge: How were you a political prisoner?
Homer: I kicked a giant mouse in the butt! Do I have to draw you a picture?
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Homer: Bart, a woman is like a beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one! (chugs beer)
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Old man: Take this doll, but beware; it carries a terrible curse.
Homer: Ooo, that's bad.
Old man: But it comes with a free serving of frozen yogurt!
Homer: That's good!
Old man: The frozen yogurt is also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Old man: But it comes with your choice of toppings!
Homer: That's good!
Old man: The toppings contain potassium benzoate...
Homer: (confused look)
Old man: That's bad.
Homer: Can I go now?
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Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.
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Homer's brain: Use reverse psychology.
Homer: Oh, that sounds too complicated.
Homer's brain: Okay, don't use reverse psychology.
Homer: Okay, I will!
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Homer: When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, like that movie -- Spaceballs. But instead it was dark and
disturbing. Like that movie -- Police Academy.
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Marge: Homer, did you call the audience "Chicken"?
Homer: No! I swear on this bible!
Marge: That's not a bible. That's a book of carpet samples.
Homer: Mmmm... fuzzy.
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Lisa: Dad, we did something very bad!
Homer: Did you wreck the car?
Bart: No.
Homer: Did you raise the dead?
Lisa: Yes.
Homer: But the car's okay?
Bart & Lisa: Uh-huh.
Homer: All right then.
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Mmmmm... reprocessed pig fat...
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(praying): Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me. As an offering, I present these milk and cookies. If you wish me to eat them instead, please give me no sign whatsoever... thy bidding will be done (munch munch munch).
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What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway.
I'm not dead yet :D :p :cool:
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