Something Kammy will surely appreciate...

Maharlika · Post by **Maharlika** » Thu Jul 10, 2003 12:21 am

...and one that Sensei will just scoff at!

1. A daughter sent a telegram to her father on passing her B.Ed exams, which the father received as "Father, your daughter has been successful in BED."

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2. A husband, while on a business trip to a hill station sent a telegram to his wife "I wish you were here."

The message received by the wife was "I wish you were her."

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3. A man wanted to celebrate his wife's Birthday by throwing a party. So he ordered a birthday cake. The salesman asked him what message he wanted put on the cake.

He thought for a moment and said, "put getting older but you are getting better".

The salesman asked "how do you want me to put it?"

The man said ' Well...put "You are getting older" at the top and "but you are getting better" at the bottom.'

When the cake was unveiled at the party all the guests were aghast at the message on the cake.

It read : "You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom."

Any similar typo stories you've got?

Chanak · Post by **Chanak** » Thu Jul 10, 2003 12:42 am

Ouch.

Scayde · Post by **Scayde** » Thu Jul 10, 2003 12:48 am

OMG...Mah, these are hilarious

Tamerlane · Post by **Tamerlane** » Thu Jul 10, 2003 10:15 pm

LOL

Never did trust telegrams

Kameleon · Post by **Kameleon** » Fri Jul 11, 2003 6:20 am

Brilliant.

I once heard about a newspaper clipping concerning a group of bikers known as "Satan's Slaves" who all decided to get their gang name tattooed on themselves. Only problem was, the tattoo artist misunderstood/was dyslexic, so they all walked out proudly marked as Stan's Slaves

fable · Post by **fable** » Fri Jul 11, 2003 7:13 am

I've mentioned this, before, but it's been a while. Back when I was working as a program director to a fairly large public radio station affiliated with a university, we used students in the Journalism School as our announcers. They were well trained, and we carefully discussed such matters as pronunciation, clarity, and technical facility with every one; but some problems of course slipped through. It could hardly be otherwise.

One day, we were in meeting when one of our best announcers, a sophomore from India, announced a wind sextet by Hummel. He proceeded to name off all the players and their instruments, ending with "...so-and-so, on f!got." That got my attention, and I hurried to speak with him before the work ended and his back announcement could be made.

It turned out that it was a German recording. The German for bassoon is "f!gott," literally meaning "wood." It's use for gays is a bit of black humor that caught on: they were literally burnt at the stake in Europe back in Ye Olden Tymes. (The term also survives in English slang for cigarettes.) Our Indian student didn't know any better, used the German word, gave it the correct English pronunciation, and ended up making a commentary on the sexual habits of a foreign bassoonist.

Craig · Post by **Craig** » Fri Jul 11, 2003 11:51 am

I once heard of a man sending his fiance an email, he had just got to some sunny holiday resort, and she wason her way. The email read something like: It's really hot down here hop to see you soon.

Nothing seems wrong? He added an unwanted "." to the address, and was instead sent to an 80-something old lady whose husband had just passed away.

Skooter327 · Post by **Skooter327** » Sun Jul 13, 2003 10:45 am

Light Switch Dept.
When Ben Franklin began fooling around with his kite, trying to discover electricity, we're sure he had much more worthwhile things in mind for Mankind, than its eventual use in the "spectacular" type of outdoor electric sign. But, thank goodness for Mankind, there's a kind of poetic justice in every abuse of a good thing. And these fancy night time advertising displays are no exception. Because, although they can be garish and annoying, they can also be a million laughs . . . mainly when some of their bulbs and tubing burn out. Here, f'rinstance, are some examples of electrical boo-boos that point up a few of the

The Hazards of Illuminated Signs:

Ivory Soap
99 44/100% PURE

You can be sure if its Westinghouse

Fly now--pay later
via TWA

WINSTON
Tastes good like a cigarette should

Know the real joy of
GOOD LIVING...
Move up to QUALITY...
Move up to SHLITZ

Chock Full O' Nuts
THE HEAVENLY COFFEE!

CUNARD LINES
Getting there is half the fun!

LISTERINE STOPS BAD BREATH
four times better than toothpaste

The man who thinks for himself knows...
only VICEROY
has a thinking man's filter...
a snnoking man's taste!

MAD Magazine
The Select choice

From: Three Ring MAD, (C)1960. Used without permission.

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Sun Jul 13, 2003 11:26 am

Originally posted by fable
It turned out that it was a German recording. The German for bassoon is "f!gott," literally meaning "wood." It's use for gays is a bit of black humor that caught on: they were literally burnt at the stake in Europe back in Ye Olden Tymes. (The term also survives in English slang for cigarettes.) Our Indian student didn't know any better, used the German word, gave it the correct English pronunciation, and ended up making a commentary on the sexual habits of a foreign bassoonist.

Ok kids, time for a history lesson. thats only partially right, Fable. F!gots were actually the bundles of wood used as kindling for good old witch burnings. Being the paranoid, scared of their own shadow type of people, when they ran out of wood, they would round up the homesexual men, woman, uneasy goats, and burn them at the stake as well. It was there that were first were reffered to as f!gots. It somehow survived, and was later adopted by North American juvenilles who thought they were cool spouting off a mix of obscure slang, l337 and obsinities.

Kameleon · Post by **Kameleon** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 2:57 am

Here's a screenshot of something my Word spellchecker threw at me when I was doing a GCSE History coursework essay...

Think about it

Gwalchmai · Post by **Gwalchmai** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 3:02 pm

I once stopped a document that my boss was about to send out concerning Public Scoping; because I noticed she had left the 'L' out of Public!