Dial-a-Cretin

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 1:54 pm

Ever wanted to impress that special loved one at a party, ever needed to look better for the family. Have you ever needed to look good in front of the boss......

Well we have the people for you Dial-a-Cretin

Just dial ********* and you can sign up one of our expert members, they will make faux pas and insensitive comments, that will make you look better. Get into a debate with one of our 'experts' and see how intelligent you can be.

It will only cost ** ** per person per hour.

Never forget.....we are on demand and we never ask question (that you don't have the answer for)

[ 08-10-2001: Message edited by: Mr Sleep ]

Yshania · Post by **Yshania** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 1:57 pm

I need to know my cut before I offer my services...(or are you offering us yours?

)

[ 08-10-2001: Message edited by: Yshania ]

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 1:57 pm

LMAO

Do you have an American branch? Or do you just hire us?

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:00 pm

Originally posted by Yshania:
Faux Pas. Sorry - couldn't resist

Thanks for the correction.

You get a 10% cut of the fee we charge the client.

@T We are going worldwide any day

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:03 pm

I'm sure it'll do very well here

Yshania · Post by **Yshania** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:20 pm

OK - before I get some ZZZs I will give you two a few to be getting on with. All signed anonymous...

What do you think (those of you, who, like me, put on a suit before going in to work) about people's ideas about long hair? I used to have two and a half foot long hair, though now I have short hair (cut to look "respectable"). I am thinking about growing it out, what do you think? What does our society think about that? Is that understandable? Respectable?

I have a dream every night (It's a nightmare really) I wake to find my computer gone and I search the house but it's gone. Panic sets in then and I start turning in bed. My wife hits me with the broom and wakes me up, still the memories linger.

I was at a concert at a local venue and all of the kids were brought up onto the stage to sing.....Well i had this obsession when i was younger of chewing gum until its taste turned for the worse, and then adding more gum to the bit's in my mouth until i ended up with a huge wodge of 7 sticks of gum in one big lump......Well the woman on stage noticed i had this gum in my mouth so she said ot stick it behind my ear. I did so. Unfortunately it ended up sticking to my hair. So there i was on stage in front of 200+ people trying desperately to remove this gum from my hair (which by the way only made it worse ) My brother was also helping - if you can call it that - by pulling long strands of the stuff just so everyone saw what had happened.

You know, I thought at first that I would be a new breed of spammer, posting only funny, insightful posts. But then Weasel started leaving little "free samples" hanging on the knob of my front door. I tried one once, it left my hair so bouncy and full; then I tried another, and it really did taste better than the cereal that I had be eating. Now Weasel is starting to charge me for my "spam fix." I've already sold my cats. I may have to stoop to stealing. Leedog - where did you say Waverly parked his car? I am DOOMED.

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:29 pm

@YSh nice pick

LMAO

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:51 pm

I know the first one was Foul

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 2:59 pm

2nd one is Gwally (i think)
3rd one Me (LOL)
4th one is Fable

Am i close?

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:02 pm

I'm not sure on the second one either

The 4th you're right about and I guess you'd knoe about the 3rd

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:08 pm

I don't feel like searching for all those, so... I'm with Sleep's choice.

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:20 pm

3rd one might be Leedog, i am not entirely sure....i would do a search but with my current connection rate that might take all of tomorow

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:21 pm

You got slowdown problems?

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:24 pm

Well my ISP sucks donkeys while fiddling lots of Baboons.

Night all, i'll see you all later, when my ISP is not sucking donkeys and is fiddling a few less baboons!

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:26 pm

Well it seems insulting it does the trick as it has come back with some speed

Hooray

T'lainya · Post by **T'lainya** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:27 pm

See ya Sleep

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Fri Aug 10, 2001 3:29 pm

Originally posted by T'lainya:
See ya Sleep

Well even though it has speeded up i am still off to bed i have a Iain Rankin Novel too finish, night all

(BTW my ISP are still a bunch of Donkey Fiddlers!

)

Fezek · Post by **Fezek** » Sat Aug 11, 2001 2:46 am

Hay Sleep, there is a shop in Stockport called "dial-a butty". Cool name huh.

Mr Sleep · Post by **Mr Sleep** » Sat Aug 11, 2001 2:50 am

Originally posted by Fezek:
Hay Sleep, there is a shop in Stockport called "dial-a butty". Cool name huh.

LMAO

vixen · Post by **vixen** » Sat Aug 11, 2001 2:56 am

I think most guys I know would prefer 'Dial a bap'.