Randomthugs updated list of worries and complaints

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 2:29 pm

so here is the deal andI dont wanna hear any "im so sorrys". I am single again, wife got the boot last weekend and we are currently "seperated" im too young, she is too young and we drove each other crazy.

I now live alone in a nice one bedroom house. I need tips, help and good damn info from everyone.

First I need to shape up, the lazy life of an american can add up the lbs.
So tips on eating healthy, cheap cooking healthy.... work out tips etc.

Secondly i need tips on keeping a place clean, whats a good way to decorate a long bare wall above a crappy couch. I need bachalor tips, you know where to hide this how to do that.

Last I need help keeping the mind not occupied of sadness just because someone isn't there... because if one and two tips go good there will be soon. Basically I need help keeping busy. I need you guys to give me idea's on how to do cool things... like make something in the house cooler and waste two hours. Or webpages and links to cool stuff a bachalor pad needs.

I've been in a relationship for over two years and before this relationship I never lived on my own (moved out at 19 with two annoying roomates, I am 22 now and have a nice little pad) I need help!!!!

Aegis · Post by **Aegis** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 3:27 pm

Basic workout stuff. Push ups, squats, sit ups.

I find sits up in which from laying on the ground, with her knees in the air, and your feet resting flat on the ground. From this position, as you sit up, touch your elbow to it's opposit knee, by bringing the knee up as well. This works nicely in trimming down love handles, as well toning abs.

The other two, I think, are self explainitory.

Also, lift anything heavily, repeatidly. I found this 40lbs. metal bar, and it worked nicely during times away from a gym.

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 3:38 pm

[QUOTE=RandomThug]

First I need to shape up, the lazy life of an american can add up the lbs.
So tips on eating healthy, cheap cooking healthy.... work out tips etc.

Secondly i need tips on keeping a place clean, whats a good way to decorate a long bare wall above a crappy couch. I need bachalor tips, you know where to hide this how to do that.

Last I need help keeping the mind not occupied of sadness just because someone isn't there... because if one and two tips go good there will be soon. Basically I need help keeping busy. I need you guys to give me idea's on how to do cool things... like make something in the house cooler and waste two hours. Or webpages and links to cool stuff a bachalor pad needs.
[/QUOTE]

Regarding food, it really depends on the amount of effort you want to invest. But, picking up that old 70s wonder, the slowcooker, can be a real boon for cheap, healthy and time saving meals. It makes good soups and stews; just throw all of the ingredients into the pot in the evening, and turn it on before you head to work. When you come home, dinner is ready.

Taking it a step further: Any leftovers can be placed into freezer/oven proof containers. This saves money and helps to avoid fast food, over-processed prepared food etc.

Keeping in shape?
I have found, and I think most people will tell you, that walking at least half an hour every day does wonders.

Decorating:
Obviously, it depends on your tastes, but if you live near an Ikea, they sell some decent prints and frames that don't cost a lot.
Or, you could always put up a shelf in the space.
In terms of cleaning, I find that if you can stick to it, what works best is just to spend a few minutes picking up and spot cleaning every day, it keeps a place from turning into a disaster zone practically overnight, and it is not nearly so arduous as spending half of the weekend with your sleeves rolled up kneedeep in housework.

Good luck

jopperm2 · Post by **jopperm2** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 4:18 pm

I can't help you in the cleaning department, but nutrition is one of my specialties. Keep in mind that the slow-cooker or crock pot will increase the glycemic index of any carbohydrate that is cooked in it. It works well for meat though. Carbs should be cooked quickly and lightly if you want to stay trim. Also, vinegar works wonders. It not only adds flavor, but is very good for you and helps you stay thin. It's also remarkably cheap. What kinds of food do you like? I can probably help you quite a bit with more specific questions. I had a long background in the restaurant industry before I went into finance, and cooking and nutrition is still a passion of mine.

Magrus · Post by **Magrus** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 10:09 pm

Cooking, I love to cook, and frankly, if your looking for a method to keep yourself busy and your mind occupied, it does do wonders.

The Foreman grill, when I moved out I got a little one from my parents, and this past christmas I got a larger, knockoff brand. I truly love it. Why? I can cook just about anything on it that isn't of a liquid nature. Bacon, burgers, french fries, chicken, chicken wings, grilled cheese, garlic bread, etc, all on the grill. I'd throw some chicken breast on it marinated in some garlic and italian dressing and make chicken caesar salads, and save half of my larger one to cut up a loaf of fresh bread and make garlic bread at the same time. Aside from the dressing, and whatever butter you put on the bread, it's fairly good for you compared to most of what single guys tend to eat. Rice and chicken go well together too, and rice if you cook it right isn't bad for you.

If your trying to save money, and have the space and enough money up front, try finding a store that sells in bulk around you. There are a few chains near me and while you throw down quite a bit more up front, I only go truly grocery shopping just about once a month, sometimes two, and the I head up to a store close by to get milk and bread and things I go through quickly. I HATE shopping, of any sort so it works for me, and you get a better deal overall on most things that way. While shopping, look for the price per pound on things, at one store you might end up paying a lot less for something just like it somewhere else. I've learned what stores carry the things I want that are of good quality and cheap prices and I go there based on what I want. EXTREMELY handy when you throw a party. Along those lines, stock up on things that are a really good deal too if you have the spare cash and the room for it. I found soda at a store by my old apparment for about 1/3 of the normal prices, and just about cleaned it out and stuffed my closet full of the stuff so I'd have a supply for the next few months of it. It was nice throwing a party and not having to kick out tons of money for drinks for everyone and just pulling out a few bottles.

Exercise isn't my thing, I love to walk though and anytime I decided I wanted to go somewhere in town that I could walk to within reason, 3 miles each way was my limit, I would. Heading out for a pizza or a burger isn't quite so bad for you if you end up working for it. It kills time too. Grab a discman or something and listen to some music and wander around town, if you happen to be in an area where its worthwhile to do so.

Decorating wasn't something I ever did. My female friends came over and demanded the right to do their thing on my walls and when I was allowed back in my room, they'd torn apart my gaming magazines and used the pictures in them to cover the wall, along with somethings they brought over and some posters a friend had given me that I never thought to put up. If you've got an artist friend, see if they'd be up for a license to be creative with your place. My brothers a good one but never has time to anything of the sort with school and work, but I've got a bunch of friends that love to draw and paint for themselves and they occasionally get in the mood they want inspiration, or the mood to draw something for someone else for a few weeks.

Some of my other friends I made in the same building, they used the bookelts from certain cds that they really liked that were full of artwork and tossed them on the walls, along with interesting carpets the found, tacked up to the ceiling. If your a drinker, well, liqour bottle collections do wonders for decorations/ conversation pieces. It's always nice to host a party and have some friends show up for the first time in a few weeks and be in awe of the massive addition to your collection and demand to know why. It's helpful when your deciding what to drink on occasion too. You can see your past choices and how often you've made that choice.

Got friends that are creative and good at putting things together on a whim? So long as I offer my buddies beer for the night, they're up for just about any sort of assitance I happen to need. A friend's car died at a party at one of our friends house and we're planning on tearing out the seats of it and making some sort of mobile furniture out of it once the weather is nice enough up here in NY again to make such an endeavor worthwhile. The thought of drop-down seats made out of the front seats of his Taurus was something that came up. Be creative, from my experience, the only time you get to is if your single or your with a girl thats highly artistic and laid back. Chances are, if you throw something together that you don't quite like, you can have fun with it later on once its been put to some use. My old computer that died on me got the Office Space treatment with the copier in the movie, along with an old computer chair, a broken guitar, a couch and a bed in our building. We had party.

Hiding things? Depends on the things your hiding, a few of my friends who are in college live in appartments that are school-sanctioned off campus dorms. Rules aren't as strict as dorms, but certain things don't fly. Old pringle cans with the bottoms torn out to toss onto beer bottles laying around and stuff helps. Not sure what your looking to hide though.

Things to do, well, all depends on your interests really. I write, read, play video games, and when all else fails, insult my roommate for something to do.
Chances are, if your gonna end up feeling sad about the situation changing, its gonna be there no matter what you do, so you might end up spending more time with a friend who can sympathise and talk to you about it. I went through that recently and a friend of a friend I was introduced to ended up getting really close recently with me which helped keep my mind off of things and cheered me up quite a bit. If you end up with tons of free time, part-time jobs help, even if you already have one. Not the most appealing thing to do with free time probably, but it'll give you extra money to have fun with and if you end up not needing it, you can leave when you want and you won't lose anything. My brother dropped his girlfriend and picked up a second job while in his "i hate females" stage and spent the extra money going out with friends.

Hope that helps.

The Z · Post by **The Z** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 12:46 am

Regarding lbs:
Eating-wise, vegetables and fruit are good because they satisfy the stomach without leaving too much behind. Obviously it's impossible to ditch meat (steak, chicken, and burgers are too damn good to pass up) but unless you're really naturally tall/built, working out fairly hard (protein regenerates muscle mass that you burn off), or growing it doesn't do a whole lot of good. It's not like you have to go on a diet though.

If you're feeling particularily energetic you can run. Running for an extended period of time is good because you build leg endurance and cardiovascular health (and helps burn off lbs). A stronger heart can go a long way. Make sure that you run by somewhere scenic, because running around downtown really isn't that fun (all the gas from the cars don't help). Anyways it's so much easier to run when you can look at something to take your mind off things. Oh yeah...try not to go running in a bad part of town.

Regarding things to do:
-There's always video games. It's a nice little escapism that works like a charm if the game's good.
-Reading books if that's your thing. There's plenty of Forgotten Realms and Dragonlance books out there if you like fantasy. The 'Ender's Game' series is a great sci-fi series, despite the fact that it's more youth oriented.
-And then if you have a fairly large group of buddies you can always start up a game of five-on-five basketball/football/soccer/road hockey on weekends. Or go to the beach and just hang out.
-And of course, starting this week, the NFL has games on Saturday and Sunday, so you can always catch a few games (and there's still Monday Night Football). Watching games over meals or with friends can waste away a good 3-3.5 hours.

Don't know if any of this helps, but just some thoughts.

jopperm2 · Post by **jopperm2** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 9:16 am

A few thoughts on rice.

An earlier post mentioned that rice isn't too bad for you if you do it right and they were totally correct. Here are some tips:

1) Use brown rice instead of white. Once you get used to it, it is about the same as white. I even like it better. It has more fiber than white and is less processed.

2) Don't buy instant rice if you can help it. If you don't have 20-30 minutes to cook the rice use parboiled rice, I think it takes about 10 minutes and it does not have the higher glycemic load of instant. It tastes better than instant too.

3) If you like it, buy a bag of wild rice and stick it in the refrigerator. You can add a little with your brown rice to add flavor, texture, and a lot of extra fiber. The wild rice will keep well in the refrigerator and it is only a couple of bucks for a bag that will last a while.

4) Get some boullion cubes in beef, chicken, and vegetable. toss one in with your water to add flavor. I like beef with my brown and wild rice. I also throw in a cheap can of mushrooms that I saute in olive oil first. Great with salmon, but in a pinch you can eat it plain or toss in some ground beef or turkey. (if your store has Pilgrim's Pride ground turkey get that, it's about a dollar a pound and works alright for hamburger helper and as a mix in ingrediant for these types of dishes)

5) Instead of butter in your rice like the package usually advises, use about a tsp or tbl of olive oil, better flavor, WAY better for you.

That's all for now.

Dr. Jopperm2

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 10:48 am

Another point on rice

I find, at least, that short grain brown rice is *much* better than the long grain. It has a nutty flavour that goes really well with the wild rice Jopperm mentioned.

Something else that occured to me, if you would be into this type of thing. Baking bread saves quite a lot of money, and it is very therapeutic to alternately roll, shape and pound a piece of dough on a kitchen counter.
It is also much healthier, depending on the ingredients you buy, I would suggest using 50% whole wheat flour to %50 white, unbleached. As you become more experienced you can also experiment and start adding various other grains, nuts, seeds etc.

It is time-consuming in one way, but not really, because you can take care of other things (dinner, laundry etc.) during the bread's risings (most breads have 2-3 rising periods)

Lastly, the smell while it is baking is really awesome and tends to give a sense of well being.

Luis Antonio · Post by **Luis Antonio** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 11:38 am

RT, I know you love cars and stuff... so spend time fixing/cleaning/waxing it... cars are a good therapy.

You have a dog or something? Animal friendships are the best you can have, and they may run with you if you are in need of exercise.

Moonbiter · Post by **Moonbiter** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 11:55 am

Well Thug, I don't know what you do for a living, but if it's the "sitting-down-in-front-of-a-screen-turning-pear-shaped" kind of thing, then I know your pain. So, from a guy who used to spend 10 hours a day and go home to an empty appartement and play CRPG's until he fell asleep at the keyboard:

1: Move around. Get out and get fresh air. Walk instead of taking the car or train or whatever. Walking is the best excersise there is. Period. Beats running by a mile. I know this gets harder depending on where you live, but it's a good motivation. When I got single in the mid 90s I ended up wlaking to work (9km) every morning. That's pretty extreme, but hey, I looked like a Sacco sack on stilts and lost 20kg in 5 months. Add to that the fact that I found time again to enjoy hobbies like fishing, hunting and camping, and it wasn't long before I found the incentive to start working out. Today I'm completely happy with the way I look, though age is of course catching up on me, and I have a ton of energy to spare. Leading to....

2: Eat basically whatever you want, and DO NOT DIET! Here's the basic rules: Skip white flour products. That means that you should avoid pasta, white bread, and such. Eat sourdough bread baked with olive oil when you need a sammich.

Don't let any "nutrition expert" tell you to avoid milk products, chicken or all the other drivel. Opinions are like.... so leave them to fight it out between themselves, as apparently EVERYTHING is bad for you.

What worked for me was plenty of lean meat, vegetables (uncooked), fish, almost no potatoes, and use vegetable oil (NOT Soy) to cook, if you don't have a chance to bbq. Wok'ing food is time-saving, and tastes fantastic. Also, and most importantly, 5 small meals a day is a gazillion times better than 2 or 3 large ones. Oh, and don't eat before you go to bed.

Jeez, have to run, will Edit in some more later.

RandomThug · Post by **RandomThug** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 12:11 pm

thank you everyone this is very useful. Moon I am going to start walking a lot now... and since i got my fridge im gonna fill it with veggie snacks so when i get the munchies or whatever i am being healthy.

Yeah i got the "Dont ever call me again" phone conversation today...

so I decided in my best interest, I leave as soon as possible.... drive full speed to vegas and get loaded till sunday.

viva los freedom

Luis Antonio · Post by **Luis Antonio** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 12:17 pm

Take care on the road, buddy, and good trip! Post a pic of your travel, if you can.

Coot · Post by **Coot** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 12:27 pm

Happy traveling, RT and come back in one piece.

dragon wench · Post by **dragon wench** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 12:35 pm

I tend to agree with Moonbiter regarding the stuff about nutrition. Basically, the best thing is to completely avoid processed foods and fast foods. Buy fresh vegetables and fruit (avoid cannned), real staples, dried beans, good cheeses, meats etc. And yes, definitely olive oil!!!

IMO, the most important thing is where food comes from and how pure it is. It are the additives that really cause the problems.

jopperm2 · Post by **jopperm2** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 1:05 pm

Not only additives, but processing. That's very important. Some good books to check out are Sugar Busters! and the shopping guide for that book, very inexpensive in paperback and it will go over in great detail most of what you'll need to know..

Magrus · Post by **Magrus** » Fri Dec 17, 2004 1:08 pm

Another thing to keep in mind, everyone processes food differently, I've found that walking a few miles every couple of days, and avoiding snacks altogether and forcing myself to cook an actual meal when I'm hungry works wonders for losing weight. Along with that, I tend to wait until I'm really craving something before eating, and then eating whatever it is that I end up craving. I end up more satisfied with my meal and don't bother eating for quite some time afterwards. There are days where I will down enormous amounts of food in that manner, but generally I stick to just two meals a day and don't end up hungry most of the time. I don't diet, if I want some fatty, horrible for you foods, I eat those. I just see to it I make those few and far between all of the things I make for myself that are reasonably healthy. It becomes far too hard to stick to something you've set up for yourself that you hate eating, so if your going to adjust your diet, make it reasonable so you don't go running off to down some junk food constantly after your meals.

Good luck with the getting loaded thing.

C Elegans · Post by **C Elegans** » Sun Dec 19, 2004 9:20 pm

I don't know anything about home decoration or cooking, but I do know a lot about how to keep busy.

I don't know what your profession is, but if you enjoy your job, focus on improving your professional skills and put yourself into challenging situations where you have the opportunity to develop. If you do not enjoy your job, consider changing and think about what you really would like to do instead.

I could suggest a thousand different things that I think are fun and interesting to do, but since I don't know what you would enjoy, I'll try to keep it more general.

1. Learn a new sports of some kind. It provides you both with excercise, which is good for your health and your looks, and it is also fun and will keep you occupied, as does everything you are just trying to learn. Learn parachuting, surfing, flamenco dancing, martial arts or whatever you think would be fun and interesting.

2. Get yourself some intellectual stimulance. Intellectual challenges keeps you busy like nothing else on this earth. Now that you have time, take time to read more difficult books, watch movies from other cultures, listen to new types of music, start learning about something you knew little about previously.

3. Entertainment. Try to avoid doing things just to kill time. Watching TV shows you aren't really interested in, hanging out with people you don't really enjoy socialising with, playing computer games you really find rather boring - all this can give you a feeling of emptyness and meaninglessness which is not surprising since it is quite empty and meaningless. Try to entertain yourself with things that give something more than time-killing. The more interesting something is, the more absorbed you will become. It's much easier and less energy consuming to forget if the distraction is something you are really engaged in.

ObsidianReturns · Post by **ObsidianReturns** » Mon Dec 20, 2004 6:20 pm

Man alive, people here have the best advice.

This thread is definately something worth reading, since I'm getting a house for next year. My independent living experience comes mostly from army life, which isn't really applicable...

But in a way it is. In garrison, you always have friends around you. So I never really get lonely. I tend to get more lonely when Im not soldiering, like now when I'm going to school and writing finals.

So what I recommend, is making a bit of a schedule, work out 3 - 5 times a week, depending how keen you are on the idea, and take up a sport in between, as CE suggests.

Sports not only take up a good portion of your time, but provide a great social outlet as well. You make friends, have something to talk about with them, and many sports allow you to vent unhappy feelings in a healthy way.

One of the best pieces of advice I ever recieved was from this forum.
I'd just come from a series of meaningless relationships, and was somewhat depressed in my search to find something more.
Turns out, sports are an amazing way to meet attractive young women, second only to drama.
Likely you aren't looking for anything romantic yet, but you are 22, and have that injured small animal quality that may serve you well.

Regardless, get ****ing loaded, and move on with life.

frogus23 · Post by **frogus23** » Wed Dec 22, 2004 1:33 pm

Maybe this is the dumbest advice you could get, as I haven't yet really had time to experience the emotional backfire, but I say the best thing to do after splitting up or fighting with a girlfriend is to make up with your other ex-girlfriends. It's ****ing impossible to do when your attached, but is strangely appealing and rewarding when you're single.

Make up with your exes, and if you end up making out with your exes, you just have all the more fixing to take your mind off of misery.

Magrus · Post by **Magrus** » Wed Dec 22, 2004 5:59 pm

Actually, that works out with me everytime I end up single, my ex's come out of nowhere and I end up spending a good amount time with them for a few months afterwards. I'd have to say it helped me out a good deal having my last two recent ex's before my last relationship be supportive, they tend to know more about you than your friends and if your still friendly with them, would know how to cheer you up too. That might be something definately worth looking into.