Please note that new user registrations disabled at this time.

The unbearable pain of stupidity.

Anything goes... just keep it clean.
Post Reply
User avatar
Waverly
Posts: 3863
Joined: Tue Jan 02, 2001 11:00 pm
Location: Valinor
Contact:
Contact Waverly

The unbearable pain of stupidity.

Post by Waverly »

Let me set the stage for you. I’m getting ready this morning, and things are progressing like most mornings, until events take an unexpected turn. At one point I find myself standing naked in front of the mirror with an electric razor in one hand and a blade razor in the other. This is not normal. Neither are my thoughts at the time. I’m looking at my already somewhat hair free torso, and I’m thinking, “You know, I can improve on this.” Mind you, I only have a small amount of chest hair and just fine down on my belly, but I’m thinking that perhaps I’d like to be really smooth for change. Wisdom is not my best quality.

It takes me only moments to realize this is a poor idea, but what am I to do? Quit with a partially shaved chest? It burns a bit… but nothing like it is going to later. And it isn’t easy going either, the hair is so fine it just seams to glide under razor without being cut, forcing me to scrape away for several minutes. And then another unforeseen problem… once you work your way down, where do you stop? Ye gods! Why have you allowed me to do this?!

A half bottle of aftershave and a full bottle of lotion later, I wallow in my own stupidity. Not only does this feel awful, it doesn’t even look good. I’m pale and pasty from the winter, and it is all to clear that my stomach muscles are less visible than they were a few short months ago. So I’ll just workout this afternoon, right? Yep… and I can’t wait to start sweating. :o :(
Then darkness took me, and I strayed out of thought and time
Top
User avatar
Omar
Posts: 402
Joined: Wed Dec 06, 2000 11:00 pm
Location: Hollandistan / Pakistan
Contact:
Contact Omar

Post by Omar »

ROFLMAO!!! That's class Waverly! Where do you get these brilliant
ideas?! :D :D
Proud member of the British Commonwealth
Top
User avatar
Bloodstalker
Posts: 15512
Joined: Wed Apr 18, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Hell if I know
Contact:
Contact Bloodstalker

Post by Bloodstalker »

Thank you for sharing that Waverly. Now I will have nightmares for weeks. :rolleyes: :cool:
Lord of Lurkers

Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell!
Top
User avatar
Beldin
Posts: 3939
Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2002 3:31 am
Location: Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
Contact:
Contact Beldin

Post by Beldin »

Sweaty, shaved smooth and naked before a mirror ?

Wait 'till the marines hear of this....the'll beat a path to your door quicker than you can say "Aegis".... ;) :D

No worries, we'll scrape up thy remains, Dr. Waverly and put them into a shine - ahem - SHRINE.... ;)

BeldinImage
Proud driver and SLURRite Linkmaster of the Rolling Thunder ™

Famous Last Words:
"You can't kill me 'cause I've got magic armoraaaaargh !"
"They're only kobolds!"
So he kills kittens? Nothing to fear about that. (CM about Foul on SYM)
"Hey Beldin ! I don't like your face !"
"Nevermore."
Top
User avatar
Vicsun
Posts: 4547
Joined: Mon Dec 25, 2000 12:00 pm
Location: liberally sprinkled in the film's opening scene
Contact:
Contact Vicsun

Post by Vicsun »

Originally posted by Waverly
Let me set the stage for you. I’m getting ready this morning, and things are progressing like most mornings, until events take an unexpected turn. At one point I find myself standing naked in front of the mirror with an electric razor in one hand and a blade razor in the other. This is not normal. Neither are my thoughts at the time. I’m looking at my already somewhat hair free torso, and I’m thinking, “You know, I can improve on this.” Mind you, I only have a small amount of chest hair and just fine down on my belly, but I’m thinking that perhaps I’d like to be really smooth for change. Wisdom is not my best quality.

It takes me only moments to realize this is a poor idea, but what am I to do? Quit with a partially shaved chest? It burns a bit… but nothing like it is going to later. And it isn’t easy going either, the hair is so fine it just seams to glide under razor without being cut, forcing me to scrape away for several minutes. And then another unforeseen problem… once you work your way down, where do you stop? Ye gods! Why have you allowed me to do this?!

A half bottle of aftershave and a full bottle of lotion later, I wallow in my own stupidity. Not only does this feel awful, it doesn’t even look good. I’m pale and pasty from the winter, and it is all to clear that my stomach muscles are less visible than they were a few short months ago. So I’ll just workout this afternoon, right? Yep… and I can’t wait to start sweating. :o :(

It's OK Wav, just get yourself some of those QUICK HAIR GROWTH pills.
Vicsun, I certainly agree with your assertion that you are an unpleasant person. ~Chanak

:(
Top
User avatar
fable
Posts: 30676
Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2001 12:00 pm
Location: The sun, the moon, and the stars.
Contact:
Contact fable

Post by fable »

You're scaring me, @Waverly.
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.
Top
User avatar
Ned Flanders
Posts: 4867
Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Springfield
Contact:
Contact Ned Flanders

Post by Ned Flanders »

That's funny, the same thing happened to me this morning.
Crush enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the women.
Top
User avatar
Aegis
Posts: 13412
Joined: Sat Dec 30, 2000 12:00 pm
Location: Soviet Canuckistan
Contact:
Contact Aegis

Post by Aegis »

Originally posted by Beldin
Sweaty, shaved smooth and naked before a mirror
Remembering your night with Grunty, are we? :D
Top
User avatar
Beldin
Posts: 3939
Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2002 3:31 am
Location: Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
Contact:
Contact Beldin

Post by Beldin »

Originally posted by Aegis
Remembering our night with Grunty, are we? :D
Of course I remember...that was the night YOU took of with those guys of the 101th airborne. ;) :D
Proud driver and SLURRite Linkmaster of the Rolling Thunder ™

Famous Last Words:
"You can't kill me 'cause I've got magic armoraaaaargh !"
"They're only kobolds!"
So he kills kittens? Nothing to fear about that. (CM about Foul on SYM)
"Hey Beldin ! I don't like your face !"
"Nevermore."
Top
User avatar
Aegis
Posts: 13412
Joined: Sat Dec 30, 2000 12:00 pm
Location: Soviet Canuckistan
Contact:
Contact Aegis

Post by Aegis »

Originally posted by Beldin


Of course I remember...that was the night YOU took of with those guys of the 101th airborne. ;) :D
Yep.. It's not easy being a pilot.... :D
Top
User avatar
Beldin
Posts: 3939
Joined: Fri Feb 08, 2002 3:31 am
Location: Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
Contact:
Contact Beldin

Post by Beldin »

Originally posted by Aegis
Yep.. It's not easy being a pilot.... :D
If you played with one of the guys "Joysticks" - that doesn't make you a pilot... :p ;)
Proud driver and SLURRite Linkmaster of the Rolling Thunder ™

Famous Last Words:
"You can't kill me 'cause I've got magic armoraaaaargh !"
"They're only kobolds!"
So he kills kittens? Nothing to fear about that. (CM about Foul on SYM)
"Hey Beldin ! I don't like your face !"
"Nevermore."
Top
User avatar
Yshania
Posts: 8572
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Some Girls Wander By Mistake
Contact:
Contact Yshania

Post by Yshania »

That is hilarious!

So where did you stop Wav? :D :D

@Ned - it concerns me that you are on Waverly wave length - no pun intended :D ;)
Parachute for sale, like new! Never opened!
Guinness, black goes with everything.
Top
User avatar
McBane
Posts: 1727
Joined: Sun Dec 17, 2000 11:00 pm
Location: Klah
Contact:
Contact McBane

Post by McBane »

Maybe you should shave your eyebrows to be consistent.
McBane
General Counsel of the [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/speak-your-mind-16/the-rolling-thunder-roadside-cafe-and-motel-21244.html"]Rolling Thunder ™[/url] - Visitors WELCOME !!!
Feel free to join us for a drink, play some pool or even relax in a hottub - want to learn [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/speak-your-mind-16/history-of-the-rolling-thunder-no-spam-19749.html#post319614"]more[/url]? )
Top
User avatar
Ned Flanders
Posts: 4867
Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Springfield
Contact:
Contact Ned Flanders

Post by Ned Flanders »

by Ysh
@Ned - it concerns me that you are on Waverly wave length - no pun intended


Hooray! Hooray! Someone cares. It's okay though, it grows back. What are you doing on friday. ;)
Crush enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the women.
Top
User avatar
Yshania
Posts: 8572
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Some Girls Wander By Mistake
Contact:
Contact Yshania

Post by Yshania »

It will still be stubble on Friday

@Ned - what makes you think I like bald men? :D well, I suppose if they are suitably oiled.....

@McB - check your PMs :)
Parachute for sale, like new! Never opened!
Guinness, black goes with everything.
Top
User avatar
Ned Flanders
Posts: 4867
Joined: Mon May 28, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Springfield
Contact:
Contact Ned Flanders

Post by Ned Flanders »

by Ysh @Ned well, I suppose if they are suitably oiled.....


Now your talkin' :p :rolleyes: Name the flavor.
Crush enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of the women.
Top
User avatar
Yshania
Posts: 8572
Joined: Wed May 09, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Some Girls Wander By Mistake
Contact:
Contact Yshania

Post by Yshania »

Castrol GTX

@Ned - erm...you are not partial to red stilletos and sequined handbags like your good drinking buddy Girlyman are you? :D :p ;)
Parachute for sale, like new! Never opened!
Guinness, black goes with everything.
Top
User avatar
Bloodstalker
Posts: 15512
Joined: Wed Apr 18, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Hell if I know
Contact:
Contact Bloodstalker

Post by Bloodstalker »

That's it Ysh, pick on my when my back is turned. Take for granted that I am not around to defend myself. HA! I fooled you didn't I? :p :D
Lord of Lurkers

Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell!
Top
User avatar
McBane
Posts: 1727
Joined: Sun Dec 17, 2000 11:00 pm
Location: Klah
Contact:
Contact McBane

Post by McBane »

Originally posted by Bloodstalker
That's it Ysh, pick on my when my back is turned. Take for granted that I am not around to defend myself. HA! I fooled you didn't I? :p :D
I'm surprised you admitting to being a Girlyman so easily BS....Ned drinks with a lot of people.....Ysh might not have meant you.. :rolleyes:
McBane
General Counsel of the [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/speak-your-mind-16/the-rolling-thunder-roadside-cafe-and-motel-21244.html"]Rolling Thunder ™[/url] - Visitors WELCOME !!!
Feel free to join us for a drink, play some pool or even relax in a hottub - want to learn [url="http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/speak-your-mind-16/history-of-the-rolling-thunder-no-spam-19749.html#post319614"]more[/url]? )
Top
User avatar
Bloodstalker
Posts: 15512
Joined: Wed Apr 18, 2001 10:00 pm
Location: Hell if I know
Contact:
Contact Bloodstalker

Post by Bloodstalker »

Her intent was obvious, rumors and innuendo have tainted my reputation. Nippy will pay. Oh, yes, Nippy will pay. :cool: :D
Lord of Lurkers

Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell!
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Speak Your Mind”