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Marriage Quotes by Men

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Vehemence
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Marriage Quotes by Men

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Marriage Quotes by Men


I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.


It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.


Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.


A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out...'


Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.


How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.


A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!' Martha replies, 'Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?' The man responds, 'I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!'


Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street bald and still think they are beautiful! I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months--I don't like to interrupt her. If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose, would you go to lunch or to a movie?


A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

Note: I didn't write this, so any woman who objects to any of this and feels like flaming me... um... try and flame me for a different reason ;) :D
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
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