Star Wars, Episode II: 'Attack of the Clones'

[Sailor Saturn]

Originally posted by Kayless:
<STRONG>Repeat after me. A clown is my friend. A clown will not bite me and throw me in the basement.</STRONG>

A clown is my friend. A clown will not bite me and throw me in the basement, but he will climb into a large mecha with a half-face clown mask, two double gattling guns, tons of missiles and other deadly projectile weapons and do triple spin flips while blowing up other mecha.

As for the title, wasn't that a B movie, or am I thinking of the Zelda RPG me and my friends did where the temples were overrun by Richard Simmons Clones on Speed? *gets scared and hides behind her Silence Wall as she quickly attempts to leave*

[scully1]

Originally posted by Kayless:
<STRONG>Freunleven! </STRONG>

"I'd like a small popcorn please."

"We don't have small."

"Then I'll take a medium."

"We dont' have medium."

"Well what do you have?"

"We have Large, Super Chubby, and Double Super Chubby!!!"

"Then isn't a large a small?"

[Kayless]

Brain: Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but there's still a bug stuck in here from last time!

Brain: Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Pinky: Uh, I think so, Brain, but I get all clammy inside the tent.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Sure, Brain, but how are we going to find chaps our size?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but I don't think Kay Ballard's in the union.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but burlap chafes me so!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but where are we going to find a duck and a hose at this hour?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but, the Rockettes? I mean, it's mostly girls, isn't it?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but pants with horizontal stripes make me look chubby.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but this time you put the trousers on the chimp!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking -- I mean, what would the children look like?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Uh, I think so Brain, but this time, you wear the tutu.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but pantyhose are so uncomfortable in the summertime!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Wuh, I think so, Brain, but isn't Regis Philbin already married?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Uh... yeah, Brain, but where are we going to find rubber pants our size?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but it's a miracle that this one grew back!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but culottes have a tendency to ride up so.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, but where will we find an open tattoo parlor at this time of night?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but first you'd have to take that whole bridge apart, wouldn't you?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but if they called them "Sad Meals", kids wouldn't buy them!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Uh, I think so, Brain, but we'll never get a monkey to use dental floss!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but 'Snowball for Windows'?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but I can't memorize a whole opera in Yiddish!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Uh, I think so, Brain, but balancing a family and a career ... ooh, it's all too much for me!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but "apply North Pole" to what?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, POIT, but where do you stick the feather and call it macaroni?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but <snort> no, no, it's too stupid!

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Umm, I think so, Don Cerebro, but, umm, why would Sophia Loren do a musical?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Umm, I think so, Brain, but what if the chicken won't wear the nylons?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but isn't that why they invented tube socks?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so Brain, but what if we stick to the seat covers?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so Brain, but if you replace the 'P' with an 'O', my name would be 'Oinky', wouldn't it?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Oooh, I think so Brain, but I think I'd rather eat the Macarena.

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so <hiccup!>, but Kevin Costner with an English accent?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but don't you need a swimming pool to play Marco Polo?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: Well, I think so, Brain, but do I really need two tongues?

Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but we're already naked!

(and my personal favorite)
Brain: Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?
Pinky: I think so, Brain, but if we didn't have ears, we'd look like weasels.



[ 08-07-2001: Message edited by: Kayless ]

[scully1]

OMG I cannot believe this!!

"I am a lab mouse, I escaped from my cage
Never held a job, never earned minimum wage...
But you will respect me, YES!! Once my plan is unfurled
You will call me your leader, I'll be king of the worrrrrld!"

"He ain't half bad."

"He ain't half good, either."

[Kayless]

Pinky: We'll be there before you could yell poit!
Brain: We'll reach Mars before I yell "poit!"
Later after the sub they've stolen is attacked...
Pinky: Egad, Brain. We'll be all right, won't we? Brain?
Brain: POIT!

[scully1]

Okay, I'm running out of memory here, so I'm just going to mention some of my favorite episodes:

The evil businessman on the plane.

The guy who never stopped talking, who ate Cheese Balls sandwiches and met Bob Barker.

OMG, the one in Buckingham Palace!!:
"We are not amused."
"How many people you got in there? Hello!! HEL-LO-OOOO!! HEL--"
"Get away from us!"
"I want my tea!!"

When Chicken Boo became the Karate Kid

When the entire 1/2 hour episode was in different languages.

[Kayless]

Originally posted by loner72:
<STRONG>The guy who never stopped talking, who ate Cheese Balls sandwiches and met Bob Barker.</STRONG>

Here's the entire bit.

PIP: Oh, hello.
YAKKO: Ooh, hi! Yakko Warner!
PIP: Pleased to meet you, Yakko. Name's Francis Pumphandle, but everyone calls me 'Pip'.
YAKKO: Great cheeseballs, huh, Pip?
PIP: I'll say. Cheeseballs are one of my all-time favourite foods. I always seem to meet the most interesting people when I'm around them too. In fact, cheeseballs bring to mind the time I met _Bob_Barker_.
YAKKO: You don't say.
PIP: Yes, indeed. _Bob_Barker_. Star of the most popular morning game show. He's a host, an emcee, _and_ a celebrity, all rolled into one. Anyway, eight months ago -- it was Tuesday the seventeenth, I believe -- or it _might_ have been the eighteenth...no, no, it was definitely the 17th, because it was precisely one week after my aunt Lucretia's birthday, which is the tenth. Aunt Lucretia's quite a woman. Loves to cook. She prepares a _fabulous_ war shu a. That's a Chinese duck dish. I _love_ Chinese food. I once went to a party where they served Chinese food _and_ cheese balls. Now _that_ was a Catch-22 situation. "Catch-22" was a movie, you know. It was long, _very_ long. They say the book was better, but it was a novel and I never finish reading those things.
YAKKO: Well, isn't that interesting.
PIP: Of course, a lot of people don't read much nowadays. They watch television. I caught a program on PBS last night. A very good show on chimpanzees. They had a clip of J. Fred Muggs, that chimp from the TODAY show. But it was Fred's
chimpanzee.
DOT: What took so long? Is Michelle Pfeiffer out there?
YAKKO: Never mind! There's a person here you gotta meet!
DOT: Mel Gibson?
YAKKO: Aaaaah -close!
YAKKO: Dot Warner, this is Francis Pumphandle.
PIP and YAKKO But everyone calls me Pip.
DOT: I'm going to hurt my brother badly.
PIPAnyway, as I was saying, eight months ago, Tuesday the seventeenth, I went
downtown on a nice, relaxing stroll. I love to relax. In fact, relaxing is a pastime of mine. Some people play golf. Others like tennis, horseshoes, bridge, canasta, and other such _fancy_ hobbies.
DOT: Wakko Warner, meet Pip. Bye.
PIP: Charmed to meetcha. Now, another hobby enjoyed by many is knitting. My grandmother was a great knitter. Knitted this sweater I'm wearing. It's red, which is _not_ my favorite color. I prefer mauve or mustard yellow. Now, don't get me wrong: red is okay for ties and suspenders, but with sweaters I prefer more neutral colors.
WAKKO: I have to go.
PIP: But when I'm relaxing, I don't care _what_ I wear: long pants, Bermuda shorts, T-shirts, or formal attire. You name it, anything goes. Now, on the seventeenth, during my relaxing stroll, I recall wearing my herringbone jacket, my Laughlin, Nevada souvenir tie, and my charcoal gray slacks. Or was it the navy slacks? Oh, I suppose it doesn't really matter, does it? What matters is comfort. You know, I once stayed at a Comfort Inn. Warm, cozy, comfortable. I love comfort. It goes along with that pastime of mine, relaxing. Now, for me, there is _nothing_ more relaxing than a nice leisurely stroll, like the one I took eight months ago on the 17th.
WAKKO: Go away!
PIP:It was a bright, sunny day which of course is the optimum condition for relaxed strolling.
WAKKO: This man is scaring me.
YAKKO: Can't say it hasn't been grand, Pip, because it hasn't. We gotta run. 'Bye!
PIP:And as I walked along, I found myself humming a haunting melody. I kept humming and humming and humming and humming. I couldn't get the tune out of my head.
YAKKO, WAKKO, DOT: Retreat!!
YAKKO: Pip, we'd love to stay and count our brain cells as they die one by one...
DOT: ...but we can't!
PIP: I racked my brains to come up with the title, but to no avail. You see,
I'm not terribly musical.And yet, I'd always wanted to play an instrument and be like my musical hero, Leo Sayer.
WAKKO: Gotta go!
YAKKO, WAKKO, DOT: 'Bye!!! Free at last, free at last, thank---
PIP: But who can compete with Leo? I think I was just scared that I'd fail.
YAKKO, WAKKO, DOT: Aaaaaaggggghhhhhhh!!!
PIP: I decided right then and there to go buy a musical instrument. So on the particular Tuesday the seventeenth to which I was referring, I went down to the Sixth Street Music Emporium to buy a _new_ tambourine, a _terribly_ soothing instrument, contrary to popular opinion. And as I was strolling along, I detected a wonderful scent in the morning air. What could it be, I asked myself.
DOT: Silence?
PIP: So I went toward that marvelous scent, distracted by its aroma from my musical mission. The odor was a mix of orchid flowers and bologna, which of course is one of the world's most under-appreciated luncheon meats. That and pimento loaf. I _love_ a good pimento loaf and mayo sandwich -- the more pimentos, the better. Why, just the _mention_ of pimentos makes my taste buds stand up and say, "Howdy." Now _there's_ an interesting word: "Howdy." Is it from "How are you" or maybe "How you doing"? "Howdy"'s one of those strange words that really _has_ no origin. I like saying "How do" more than "Howdy" -- more formal, I think. Not too flowery. But the flowery aroma of that particular Tuesday morning carried me on my fragrant quest.
YAKKO: Adios.
WAKKO: Arrivederci.
DOT: Au revoir.
YAKKO: Sayonara.
WAKKO: Aloha oe.
DOT: Oy vey. Ah, home sweet home.
PIP: Now, the smell was actually _less_ bologna and more orchid -- the beautiful flower found on the island state of Hawaii. Of course, I wasn't _in_ Hawaii, so I needed to search out the location of the nearest orchid. So, I visited every florist's shop in town. Well, to make a _long_ story short, not a _single_ flower shop in town had _any_ orchids in stock, which seemed _mighty_ curious to me. Now, as we all know, curiosity killed the cat, but since I'm not a feline, I wasn't _too_ worried. Felines are funny creatures, don't you think? I had a cat once. It used its claws to tear my living room couch to shreds. It was a comfy couch, too. Had a sleep-away bed in it with a foam rubber mattress. Now, I bought the couch _and_ the mattress at Levine's Department Store on Third Avenue, the _very_ same afternoon of that relaxing stroll aforementioned. I also bought myself a _lovely_ tambourine on that _same_ shopping expedition. Anyway, I didn't want to pay extra for the delivery of the couch, so I decided to carry the couch home myself. It was _quite_ cumbersome. And getting it through the store's revolving doors was a _bit_ of a challenge. And _just_ as I emerged onto the street, by accident I bumped into a well-dressed man with an orchid in his lapel. It was _Bob_Barker_ and he was eating a bologna and cheese balls sandwich. Well, it's been nice chatting with you.
YAKKO, WAKKO, DOT: Huh?
PIP: Bye!
DOT: It's too quiet!
WAKKO: I miss him!!
YAKKO: Pip! Wait! Pip! Come back! Tell us another story!
DOT: Please! I wanna learn more about bologna!
WAKKO: Did you ever meet Don Knotts?
YAKKO: Oh, tell us, please do!



[ 08-07-2001: Message edited by: Kayless ]

[Vehemence]

Kayless you poor sod! You've got entirely too much time on your hands!

[Kayless]

It's sad isn't it. And I've got more!

Good Idea / Bad Idea

GI: Feeding stray kittens in the park.
BI: Feeding stray kittens in the park to a bear.

GI: Taking a deep breath before jumping into a swimming pool.
BI: Taking a deep breath after jumping into a swimming pool.

GI: Kissing a loved one.
BI: Kissing a total stranger.

GI: Doing your own yard work.
BI: Doing your own dental work.

GI: Playing the accordion at a polka festival.
BI: Playing the accordion anywhere else.

GI: Whistling while you work.
BI: Whistling while you eat.

GI: Drinking fresh milk from the carton.
BI: Drinking fresh milk from the cow.

GI: Singing Christmas carols to your neighbors.
BI: Singing Christmas carols to your neighbors on the Fourth of July.

GI: Finding Easter eggs on Easter morning.
BI: Finding Easter eggs on Christmas morning.

GI: Going trick-or-treating on Halloween.
BI: Going trick-or-treating on St Patrick's Day.

GI: Ordering a chili dog to go.
BI: Ordering a chili dog that makes you go.

GI: Tossing a penny into a fountain to make a wish.
BI: Tossing your cousin Penny into a fountain to make a wish.

GI: Playing cops'n'robbers in the park.
BI: Playing cops'n'robbers in the bank.

GI: Buying a pair of shoes on sale.
BI: Buying a parachute on sale.

GI: Climbing a mountain.
BI: Climbing a mountain lion.

The End

[ThorinOakensfield]

Originally posted by loner72:
<STRONG>Fox Network Presents: WHEN CLONES ATTACK!!!</STRONG>

When good clones go bad.
World's wildest clone chases.

[Vehemence]

LMAO at the GI/BI

[Sailor Saturn]

At Texas A&M University, they successfully managed to clone a human being! There was one problem, though. The clone had this obsession with flashing people. He would run around wearing nothing but a trench coat and randomly flash people, so they locked him up in a room beneath the football stadium.

Then, during the Home Coming game between UT and A&M, the clone escaped. He ran out onto the field during half time and flashed everyone. A group of Aggies(A&M dudes) started chasing him. They chased him all the way up onto the pressbox(?). They moved closer to him as he backed towards the edge and then he fell off to his death. That group of Aggies got arrested for making an obscene clone fall.

[Vehemence]

Originally posted by Sailor Saturn:
<STRONG>At Texas A&M University, they successfully managed to clone a human being! There was one problem, though. The clone had this obsession with flashing people. He would run around wearing nothing but a trench coat and randomly flash people, so they locked him up in a room beneath the football stadium.

Then, during the Home Coming game between UT and A&M, the clone escaped. He ran out onto the field during half time and flashed everyone. A group of Aggies(A&M dudes) started chasing him. They chased him all the way up onto the pressbox(?). They moved closer to him as he backed towards the edge and then he fell off to his death. That group of Aggies got arrested for making an obscene clone fall.</STRONG>

Oh dear, there goes that whole attraction thing again... you do realise that making bad jokes is my area of expertise! Although Aegis is my student in this, he learns fast!

[Kayless]

@Sailor Saturn, LOL Was it a clone of Gruntboy perchance? ?

[ThorinOakensfield]

Originally posted by Vehemence:
<STRONG>Oh dear, there goes that whole attraction thing again... you do realise that making bad jokes is my area of expertise! Although Aegis is my student in this, he learns fast! </STRONG>

You may have to take this to court.
Need a lawyer?
Low rate of $500 a minute, no no, an hour.

[Sailor Saturn]

Originally posted by Kayless:
<STRONG>@Sailor Saturn, LOL Was it a clone of Gruntboy perchance? ? </STRONG>

Why, yes, I think it was.

[Xandax]

Originally posted by Kayless:
<STRONG>Ever been in a packed theatre while watching the original trilogy? There’s an electricity in the audience that I’ve yet to see equaled in any other movie viewers.
</STRONG>

Trying be packed into a theatre for 43 hours to see James Bond movies (all except Never Say Never) - now that is cool

Actually I don't care much what they call the new SW movie, I'm gonna see it anyway

[Kayless]

Originally posted by Xandax:
<STRONG>Actually I don't care much what they call the new SW movie, I'm gonna see it anyway </STRONG>

Amen to that.

[Vehemence]

Originally posted by Kayless:
<STRONG>Amen to that. </STRONG>

While we're prayin' can I pray that Jar Jar get's assasinated in the next movie?

[Mr Sleep]

Originally posted by Vehemence:
<STRONG>While we're prayin' can I pray that Jar Jar get's assasinated in the next movie?

</STRONG>

Amen to that!