if you could make a spell ...

Omar · Post by **Omar** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 2:30 pm

Aahh,Waverly!What a nice spell. With Traci Lords at your side you could generate some major income as a pimp (back rooms of the CC for example..)

KN · Post by KN » Wed Jan 17, 2001 2:40 pm

Clinton Charisma boost

Everything you do including telling lies, breaking laws, backstabbing your followers, Stealing, raises your reputation points and when the spell is finished you always come out looking like a hero with women wanting you.

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"Four thousand throats may be cut in one night, by a running man."
- Klingon Crewman "Day of the Dove"

Malachai · Post by **Malachai** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 3:49 pm

Summon Horny Poodles (lvl 5)

This spell summons 1d6 horny poodles that will hump the legs of your enemies. Enemies are slowed unless beset by 2 or more poodles in which case the target is held.

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"What is best in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven before you and hear the lamentation of their women!"
-Conan the Barbarian

Ubik · Post by **Ubik** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 3:53 pm

KN looks like a republican

Omar · Post by **Omar** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 3:54 pm

Wouldn't horny poodles rather beset each other instead of enemy legs?

Ubik · Post by **Ubik** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 3:57 pm

Monika in the office lvl 9 spell

When cast, the target loses all protections, no saving throws allowed, plus get stunned for 4 rounds.
The caster must have "protection from press" casted upon himself, or he could be effected too

[This message has been edited by Ubik (edited 01-17-2001).]

XtraniuM · Post by **XtraniuM** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:00 pm

This is the funniest thread I've ever read...

Waverly · Post by **Waverly** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:02 pm

Butterfly Ballot lvl 8
Have your intelligence reduced to that of a florida voter (save vs. magic and you only drive really slow in the passing lane)

Drakron Du´Dark · Post by **Drakron Du´Dark** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:06 pm

"florida vote counting" lv8
This spell makes a mage to lose half his spell on his spell book, makes him unable to use scrolls and stunt for 4 week.

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"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not became a monster... when you gaze long into the abyss the abyss gazes into you..."
Friedrich Nietzsche

Ubik · Post by **Ubik** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:11 pm

The CNN touch lvl 7

Unless a saving throw vs braiwash (at -4) is being made, the target thinks he is the president of the United States and just puffs away. If saved, target gets confused for 2 rounds

Doltan · Post by **Doltan** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:12 pm

Great posts!

Is it just me, or does anyone else think that Katherine Harris is a doppleganger?

Waverly · Post by **Waverly** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:18 pm

She has the look of the undead. Someone is also using a mind control ring on her.

one last one from me:
STD lvl 7
Target suffers the embarrsment (confusion) and pain (4D6) of buring genitals.

this sketch is over, it's just too silly.

Doltan · Post by **Doltan** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:23 pm

Entangle: used to stop African American voting in Florida.
Time Stop: used to discontinue the vote counting.
Enfeeblement: used to slow the vote-counters in Miami-Dade.
Limited Wish: used by Dubya, but his low Wisdom will have unanticipated effects.

Who knew George Jr. was such a high level mage?

Krom · Post by **Krom** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:24 pm

I'd like to see the 7th lvl priest spell Regeneration work as it does in the spell description.

"Hey Aerie, you and Quayle couldn't find a way to restore those wings, huh? Here, now you can grow 'em back."

Karembeu · Post by **Karembeu** » Wed Jan 17, 2001 4:58 pm

Originally posted by XtraniuM:
This is the funniest thread I've ever read...

Xtranium for laughs check out several of the other topics (almost every single one soon)...look for the names of Ubik and Gruntboy and read......and laugh a lot (if you've got that kind of mind)...

samcu · Post by **samcu** » Thu Mar 01, 2001 7:25 pm

Originally posted by Seabass:
The All Knowing He Man Bitchslap

Summons forth a great hand of an ancient pimp, which slaps the bitch ( targeteted enemie ) for 6D60 damage... Also, makes target cries and bitch for 10 rounds (Domination)

This has to be the funniest spell to animate, especially with Deuce's he-pimp's voice...

Drakron Du´Dark · Post by **Drakron Du´Dark** » Thu Mar 01, 2001 7:29 pm

You really like to dig up old treads, do you....
Try to find this one.
"pay no atention, this does not say anything" by Odin.

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ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US
Cats, 2101.

samcu · Post by **samcu** » Thu Mar 29, 2001 4:09 am

I am a slow reader, well, I came from page 55+ to page 18 in 2 months, and it is going to get better from now on...

Shadowstrider · Post by **Shadowstrider** » Thu Mar 29, 2001 4:58 am

Just to let you know, you CAN make your own spells.
[url="http://www.teambg.com"]www.teambg.com[/url] has a download called IEEP(Infinity Engine Editor Pro) which allows custom items and spells to be made, along with other things.

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[url="http://www.worldzone.net/games/strider"]Strider's Chambers[/url]

Garcia · Post by **Garcia** » Thu Mar 29, 2001 4:58 am

Originally posted by Ubik:
Monika in the office lvl 9 spell

When cast, the target loses all protections, no saving throws allowed, plus get stunned for 4 rounds.
The caster must have "protection from press" casted upon himself, or he could be effected too

[This message has been edited by Ubik (edited 01-17-2001).]

Don't you mean "protection from Erection"?