Re: A History lesson for the wee ones
Posted: Tue May 06, 2003 10:48 pm
Originally posted by Curdis
The History of The one true FORUM - by A. Notedhistorian (This is not an anagram of Nostradameus)
In the beginning there was Buck - guess that's right, wasn't there, although Equis appears to have grounds to dispute it.
Back in the old days, when THE FORUM consisted of a small bunch of people throwing stone and clay tablets into the air (carefully stencilled with useful BG2 advice). Buck saw all of this and declared it good but decided to move to newfangled software version 2. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, and the forum cried out with much pointless critism especially about how their post count was off by 3 and they used to be a 'revolting spot on the hall carpet' and now were an 'Exalted but Smelly Junior Member' (etc.)
But soon most 'put a sock in it' and the forum settled into the golden age. New members would ask if a Barbarian could 'really eat whole shovelfuls of gravel at the Five Flagons' and would be told that they had 'just spoiled it for everyone, Thanks Heaps' by the helpful existing members. But an evil presence lurked over the forum and seeing that it was good and all were content, except for the post count business... and started (via a deluded minion - not the last) the misleadingly titled 'Goody' thread.
And many TRUE MEMBERS(TM) yeah even those who had shamefully posted mistakenly in 'goody' turned away from the evil which had now broken the newfangled software vs.2 forum. But was the evil satisfied that it had turned Buck's little corner of Madison County into a sewer of a new suburban marina development in the abyss?
No - it spawned more of its ilk. It filled helpful advice requests with unrecognisable sentences, incomprehensible phrases and just plainly physically impossible suggestions. Buck help the poor 60 year old bald man who happened to be called Chrissy who asked for some help getting into the upper rooms of the Copper Coronet! For the evil was soon drowning in the very spittle (At least we shall CALL it spittle) from its own maw dripping onto the keyboard in front of it.
Soon Buck heard the silent prayers of the TRUE MEMBERS(TM) and decided that a corporate restructure was called for. The 'value stream' of the corporation would continue to do what was intended in the promised FORUM and the rest would henceforth be banished to Sales, Yardage, and Marketing or SYM for short because that is what the folks in Sales, Yardage and Marketing liked. And yeah there was much rejoicing, and the fatted lamb was spit (despite some protests from the farming community).
And all would have lived happily ever after except the evil grew and grew until it had nearly attained the bloated number of 8888!
Buck saw that unless he acted soon there would be an age of crashes (much like goody) and so implemented with great lack of sleep newfangled software version 3. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth and Sales, Yardage and Marketing asked if they could have it in any colour and the answer came 'yes you can.' and some posted in black on black and low their posted works were of the same usefulness as before! Truly it was an age of miracles.
Then Sales, Yardage, and Marketing asked if they could have cutsey little pictures so they could be more productive in Sales, Yardage, and Marketing, and the answer came 'yes you can.' and there was much policy work done and a fat binder was produced with color swatch samples. Truly it was an age of miracles.
And the TRUE MEMBERS(TM) saw how Sales, Yardage and Marketing had become bloated and started to ooze a bit here and there and were heard to say the mantra "When it blows I just hope none gets on me".
And there was much rejoicing... - Curdis !
Been a while, figured it was time to bring this back....for the good of the board.
