While you were sleeping
Posted: Wed Jul 31, 2002 12:10 pm
The clock clicked its silent digital click as time rolled over to two in the morning. Sweating from the stress and frustration of the day I sat quietly in front of my computer, the low hum from the proccessor fan the only sound echoing in the vastness of my room. I wonder over and over what would be of my life If I had not dropped out of that college, where I would be if I hadn't decided to dump my ex... what life would be like if I lied on the military exame and didnt mark down I had asthma. Would I be this disturbed still? Would my head hurt, my back ache and my mind basically throb with this constant acknowledgement of how far in debt I have become.
While you sleep I sit and ponder, the what ifs.. the whys... the maybes. I then decide its not worth the worry, its not worth the struggle... I contemplate for a heart beat running away, changing my name. Perhaps driving off that cliff isnt so bad of an idea... no thats not going to work, I have to many beers to drink and to many friends to make before I leave this hell hole.
On that note I go get a beer, still I have typed nothing on my moniter... its now three o clock, i have to wake up in three hours for work. Put on that fake smile, go around fixing computers... setting up a network... fix this hub, correct my spellcheck... man I dont wanna go... but I have to. I am only 20 years old and already about 20k in debt, and I have nothing to show of it...
Fosters is a good beer for depression, thick enough to leave a sting.... but not too thick to create a belly ache.
Well four o clock rolls around, Im out of weed and out of beer now... nothing left to do but hit the sack.
But I cant sleep.
thug
(ps im not this depressing normally, just had to type it and didnt know where it put it)
While you sleep I sit and ponder, the what ifs.. the whys... the maybes. I then decide its not worth the worry, its not worth the struggle... I contemplate for a heart beat running away, changing my name. Perhaps driving off that cliff isnt so bad of an idea... no thats not going to work, I have to many beers to drink and to many friends to make before I leave this hell hole.
On that note I go get a beer, still I have typed nothing on my moniter... its now three o clock, i have to wake up in three hours for work. Put on that fake smile, go around fixing computers... setting up a network... fix this hub, correct my spellcheck... man I dont wanna go... but I have to. I am only 20 years old and already about 20k in debt, and I have nothing to show of it...
Fosters is a good beer for depression, thick enough to leave a sting.... but not too thick to create a belly ache.
Well four o clock rolls around, Im out of weed and out of beer now... nothing left to do but hit the sack.
But I cant sleep.
thug
(ps im not this depressing normally, just had to type it and didnt know where it put it)