Towels
Posted: Fri Mar 01, 2002 6:04 am
According to the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, the towel is the most important asset to any traveller. Imagine my surprise when I discovered this was true. Three weeks ago I was driving back from my brothers house in Kent when, on that deathtrap the M25, I heard a buzzing noise. I pulled off at the nearest exit and then I heard a lovely scraping noise. Lo and behold the bracket that was keeping one end of my exhaust pipe attached to the chassis had twisted and broken. "Super", I happily smiled. I don't swear in public. So I looked around in my car for something to temporarily re-attach the pipe and heard Alec Guinnes softly whisper in my ear " Use the towel, Fez-lad, use the towel." I shook my head but found the towel. Using all the skills I had learnt at cubs( except the ones to do with locating adult magazines in nearby woods) I re-attached the pipe with my towel. Amazing I cried.
Later, whilst on the M6 just outside of Birmingham, the fates had decided I was too clever so they decide to snap my exhaust pipe in two. But , there was a fightback. My towel wasn't quite ready to throw in the boxer just yet. The noise was blinding. My car sound like that scene from Blazing Saddles where all the cowboys decide to buy out the entire stock of Baked Beans from the local TESCO's. Me, embarrassed(sp?)!!
Of course there was a great clanking noise as you would imagine from a twenty pound lump of inconveniently shaped metal smacking about from underneath ones car. But, the back part of the pipe WASN'T 3 miles behind me helping to cause another motorway accident. It was still attached to the car. I pulled over and got out of the car. I looked at the back of the car and there was the sorry twisted lump of the "back box"( as car mechanics like to call them) staring at me apologetically, tears in its eyes ( yeah, yeah I'm waffling now). I then looked under the car and to my amazement there, winking at me was my towel. It had done it's job. Where a german crafted metal bracket had failed it, this simple piece of warp and wefted cotton had remain true to it's word and kept the flopping piece of back box attached to the car. Seriously, it had probably prevented a motorway accident. I raise a glass to my towel and Douglas Adams, RIP.
Naturally the journey from Birmingham to my house in Cheshire( sorry Ysh, I'm a Cheshire lad, Ive been Stephen Byers about my Lancastrian roots) was to put it simply like listening to one long eggy boff.
Anybody else have great towel stories?
Later, whilst on the M6 just outside of Birmingham, the fates had decided I was too clever so they decide to snap my exhaust pipe in two. But , there was a fightback. My towel wasn't quite ready to throw in the boxer just yet. The noise was blinding. My car sound like that scene from Blazing Saddles where all the cowboys decide to buy out the entire stock of Baked Beans from the local TESCO's. Me, embarrassed(sp?)!!
Of course there was a great clanking noise as you would imagine from a twenty pound lump of inconveniently shaped metal smacking about from underneath ones car. But, the back part of the pipe WASN'T 3 miles behind me helping to cause another motorway accident. It was still attached to the car. I pulled over and got out of the car. I looked at the back of the car and there was the sorry twisted lump of the "back box"( as car mechanics like to call them) staring at me apologetically, tears in its eyes ( yeah, yeah I'm waffling now). I then looked under the car and to my amazement there, winking at me was my towel. It had done it's job. Where a german crafted metal bracket had failed it, this simple piece of warp and wefted cotton had remain true to it's word and kept the flopping piece of back box attached to the car. Seriously, it had probably prevented a motorway accident. I raise a glass to my towel and Douglas Adams, RIP.
Naturally the journey from Birmingham to my house in Cheshire( sorry Ysh, I'm a Cheshire lad, Ive been Stephen Byers about my Lancastrian roots) was to put it simply like listening to one long eggy boff.
Anybody else have great towel stories?
