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Today is a very important day for Omar. After months of studying at the Academy of Spamming&Flaming, together with his faithfull companion the Pre-Spammers Guide, he is attending the finals, today...
The hall is filled with an eerie silence, like something catastrophical is about to happen; students with both anxious and nervous looks on their faces; gushing sweat; this is the moment they have been waiting for; today it is judgment day...
Omar looks at the questions; his mouth is dry; his cloths are soaked; pain in his stomach..."This is more difficult than I thought it would be!"

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THE FINAL EXAM

Candidate: Omar, romantic Jr. member

Section 1: 'flame'
Flame the following people as best you can. You may not use more than 30 words!

1. FoulDwimmerlaik: "Yesterday I went to the zoo and got seduced by a gorilla. I do not know if I should pursue this relation or not."
1.My flame: "If it makes you happy Foul than you should; remember: love knows no bounds!"

2.Ubik: "ROFLMDBAOFDRTRHS!"
2.My flame: "I second that Ubik!"

3. Gruntboy: "I have this terrible diarrhoea; it's going on for days now; I feel exhausted!"
3. My flame: "Try yogurt with crackers Gruntboy1"

4. T'lainya: "Thanks for that juice Brink! It really quenched my thirst!"
4. My flame: "Mmmmmm, delicious!"

5. Chrissy: "I'm sitting in my room, reading the Playgirl."
5. My flame: "Naughty girl!"

6.Darkpoet: "I'm at a loss here. There is a hole in my new underpants after just one week of use! Can you believe that?!"
6.My flame: "You have been ripped man!"

7.Vixen: "Does any of you know how much your average plastic surgery costs?"
7.My flame: "You are beautiful just the way you are now Vixen!"

8. Buck Satan: "I'm adding a new section to this site tomorrow: the Pokemon gallery. Hope you enjoy it!"
8. My flame: "Pika...pika...!"

9.Minerva: "Brains are just way cool man! It gave me a kick when I operated Waverly and played with his brain!"
9.My flame: "Brain fetish!!!?!"

10.Flagg: "I'm lying in bed, flirting with my dolls."
10.My flame: "You are pathetic!"

Section 2: 'spam'
Spam the following two serious topics as best you can.

1.Waverly: "Alright you people, this is a serious question; so please refrain from spamming (and flaming). I have been posting here for some time now and therefore I'm interested. in what all of you think of me. Would you be able to fall in love with me based on my posts? (I'm bisexual BTW)"
1. My spam: "SPAM SPAM SPAM!"

2.Weasel: "I'm so ashamed of myself! My wife divorced me because I didn't want to take her to the Power Rangers movie! I'm a looser!"
2 My spam: "SPAM SPAM SPAM!"

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This part is for the supervisors to fill in:

1.Suggestions/recommendations for the candidate:
2.Overall grade:
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Omar looks to the far end of the hall, where Dr. Weasel and Dr. Waverly are sitting on a large dias; monitoring the students with video cameras. "Something tells me that I'll fail hideously. Aargh, after so much preparations; why!!?! I gave everything I had!" Suddenly Omar feels something familiar stirring inside of him; the extreme mental pressure has awakened his basic instinct once again; his inner voice of reason...
<lock the door!>
Omar locks the door to the hall.
<grab your exam and pencil and hand your exam over to the professors!>
Omar stands in front of W&W.
<ask them to grade it imediately!>
"Grade this now, please!"
<if you fail Omar: killing spree...killing spree...killing spree...KILLING SPREE!!!!!>

"Well Docs?"

This is what the author of that useless little thing called the pre-spammer's guide has to say:

1.Omar lost some marks in his flaming test for not using any emoticons to express his rage.Not only that,the quotes from him below aren't really flames :

Originally posted by Omar:
<STRONG>7.Vixen: "Does any of you know how much your average plastic surgery costs?"
7.My flame: "You are beautiful just the way you are now Vixen!"</STRONG>

Originally posted by Omar:
<STRONG>8. Buck Satan: "I'm adding a new section to this site tomorrow: the Pokemon gallery. Hope you enjoy it!"
8. My flame: "Pika...pika...!"</STRONG>

2.In addition to the above comment,I feel that Omar requires more training in the field of spamming,since it appears that Omar has a very limited range of words to choose from when he is required to spam

[ 05-20-2001: Message edited by: Brink ]

Omar, Doc Waverly is taking a bath right now and is taking his precious time adoring his "manhood" at his mirror filled bathroom. So I'll be grading your exam as TA

2.Ubik: "ROFLMDBAOFDRTRHS!"
2.My flame: "I second that Ubik!"
3. Gruntboy: "I have this terrible diarrhoea; it's going on for days now; I feel exhausted!"
3. My flame: "Try yogurt with crackers Gruntboy1"

Comments : Not hard enough, considering Ubik & GB is tough players

8. Buck Satan: "I'm adding a new section to this site tomorrow: the Pokemon gallery. Hope you enjoy it!"
8. My flame: "Pika...pika...!"

Were you sleeping when The Doc Give you lessons ????

1.Waverly: "Alright you people, this is a serious question; so please refrain from spamming (and flaming). I have been posting here for some time now and therefore I'm interested. in what all of you think of me. Would you be able to fall in love with me based on my posts? (I'm bisexual BTW)"
1. My spam: "SPAM SPAM SPAM!"

2.Weasel: "I'm so ashamed of myself! My wife divorced me because I didn't want to take her to the Power Rangers movie! I'm a looser!"
2 My spam: "SPAM SPAM SPAM!"

This is a true disappointment also, since this show that you only master chapter 2

Overall, Omar you require to study more. I recommend you to attend more seminars and spend lots of your time in Academy labs.....I can see that your lab attendance got unsatisfactory mark.

Originally posted by Brink:
<STRONG>This is what the author of that useless little thing called the pre-spammer's guide has to say:

1.Omar lost some marks in his flaming test for not using any emoticons to express his rage.Not only that,the quotes from him below aren't really flames....

[ 05-20-2001: Message edited by: Brink ]</STRONG>

Brink- either Omar is completely butt licking with his comment to me...or he is being completely evil (You look lovely as you are Vixen (LIE LIE!!!!)) in which case I will chargrill his a$$ and serve it to Craig and Cheesemage in a bun with a side order of fries.

If he is being nice though, I guess I'm in good company. I note his successful flaming of everybody else apart from God himself, the almighty Buck. Hey, does that make me a Goddess or something??

[ 05-20-2001: Message edited by: vixen ]

“FOOLS!!! DORFMUU IS THE ONLY GOD OF THE INTERNET! BOW DOWN AND KISS HIS MAJESTICALLY HAIRY KOBOLD ASS, LEST HE SMITE (bitch slap) THEE!!!”

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Disciple of Dorfmuu, all-powerful Kobold God of the Outer Planes who can bitch slap Drizzt, Elminster, Mystra, Ao, and yo’ momma.

Erm,am I now the president of this academy??

*Brink prepares his speech in case he gets elected*

Well Brink,if you are the president ,why don't you do your buddy Omar a favor by handing him out his degree?

@All:thanks for your constructive comments; though I deliberately failed my test in order to go on a killing spree, for no apparent reason.

@Vixen:I was just licking your butt , and I enjoyed it

Oh gotta go!

Omar-The thing is,we have pretty high expectations here ........

Originally posted by Omar:
<STRONG>
@All:thanks for your constructive comments; though I deliberately failed my test in order to go on a killing spree, for no apparent reason.!</STRONG>

I believe it was Darkpoet's fault you failed You can find him in the slave pit in the Harem

Originally posted by Omar:
<STRONG>@Vixen:I was just licking your butt , and I enjoyed it
</STRONG>

Oh good one mister instructor, it's my fault that he didn't pass. I wasn't grading him.

Originally posted by Omar:
<STRONG>
@Vixen:I was just licking your butt , and I enjoyed it
</STRONG>

I'm glad you found it so enjoyable.