The Silver Monkey Inn
-
cheesemage
- Posts: 1044
- Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2001 11:00 pm
- Location: Inside a water proof fish tank
- Contact:
*Loner takes her guitar onto the stage and begins to sing:*
Yesterday in old Fall River Mr. Andrew Borden died
And they got his daughter Lizzie on a charge of homicide
Some folks say she didn't do it and others say "of course she did!"
But they all agree Miss Lizzie B. was a problem kind of kid
'Cause you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Not even if it's planned as a surprise
No you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
You know how neighbors love to criticize
Now she got him on the sofa where he'd gone to take a snooze
And I hope he went to heaven, 'cause he wasn't wearin' shoes (huh??...)
Lizzie kinda rearranged him
with a hatchet, so they say
Then she got her mother in that same old-fashioned way
But you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
Not even if you're tired of her cuisine
No you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
You know it's almost sure to cause a scene
Well they really kept her hoppin' all that busy afternoon
With both down- and upstairs choppin'
while she humemd a ragtime tune
They really made her hustle and when all was said & done
She'd removed her mother's bustle when she wasn't wearin' one
Oh you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
And then blame all the damage on the mice
No you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
That kind of thing just isn't very nice
Now it wasn't done for pleasure, and it wasn't done for spite
And it wasn't done because the lady wasn't very bright.
Y'see she'd always done the slightest thing that mom & papa bid
They told her "Lizzie, cut it out!"
SO THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SHE DID!!
But oh you can't chop your papa up in Masssachusetts
And then get dressed and go out for a walk
No you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Massachusetts is a far cry from New York!!
Oh no you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Jump like a fish, jump like a porpoise, all join hands in habeas corpus!!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Such a snob, I've heard it said she met her pa and cut him dead!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Shut the door and lock & latch it, here comes Lizzie with a brand new hatchet!!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Massachusetts is a far cry from New York!!!
Yesterday in old Fall River Mr. Andrew Borden died
And they got his daughter Lizzie on a charge of homicide
Some folks say she didn't do it and others say "of course she did!"
But they all agree Miss Lizzie B. was a problem kind of kid
'Cause you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Not even if it's planned as a surprise
No you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
You know how neighbors love to criticize
Now she got him on the sofa where he'd gone to take a snooze
And I hope he went to heaven, 'cause he wasn't wearin' shoes (huh??...)
Lizzie kinda rearranged him
with a hatchet, so they say
Then she got her mother in that same old-fashioned way
But you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
Not even if you're tired of her cuisine
No you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
You know it's almost sure to cause a scene
Well they really kept her hoppin' all that busy afternoon
With both down- and upstairs choppin'
while she humemd a ragtime tune
They really made her hustle and when all was said & done
She'd removed her mother's bustle when she wasn't wearin' one
Oh you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
And then blame all the damage on the mice
No you can't chop your mama up in Massachusetts
That kind of thing just isn't very nice
Now it wasn't done for pleasure, and it wasn't done for spite
And it wasn't done because the lady wasn't very bright.
Y'see she'd always done the slightest thing that mom & papa bid
They told her "Lizzie, cut it out!"
SO THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SHE DID!!
But oh you can't chop your papa up in Masssachusetts
And then get dressed and go out for a walk
No you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Massachusetts is a far cry from New York!!
Oh no you can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Jump like a fish, jump like a porpoise, all join hands in habeas corpus!!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Such a snob, I've heard it said she met her pa and cut him dead!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
(Shut the door and lock & latch it, here comes Lizzie with a brand new hatchet!!)
Can't chop your papa up in Massachusetts
Massachusetts is a far cry from New York!!!
Dude: This is a self service Inn. I fired the hired help last week due to incompetencies.
Please make use of our fully equipped Karaoke facilities too
Please make use of our fully equipped Karaoke facilities too
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
Dude: Ah the days when Chrissy, Alexia and I would serve drinks in Brinks absense!
Spandax: Heya!
Spandax: Heya!
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
Well I'm outta here for a while, so your left with the dude.Originally posted by Xandax:
<STRONG>Hiya you 2 - are you all that SYM can present at this hour - tsk tsk tsk
Cartoon Law III
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.
Any body passing through solid matter will leave a perforation conforming to its perimeter. Also called the silhouette of passage, this phenomenon is the speciality of victims of directed-pressure explosions and of reckless cowards who are so eager to escape that they exit directly through the wall of a house, leaving a cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The threat of skunks or matrimony often catalyzes this reaction.