| | | Advertisement |  | | | |
 | GameBanshee Forums
| | 
10-14-2007, 03:11 PM
|  | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 17,964
| |  Why Parents Drink
Blame my twisted sense of humour, but I found this pretty funny  Why Parents Drink
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was
nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped
up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad." With the worst
premonition he opened the envelope with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with
my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you. I have
been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew you
would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight
motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's
not only the passion...Dad she's pregnant. Stacy said that we will be very
happy. She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the
whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Stacy has
opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll
be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live
nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science
will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it. Don't
worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure
that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
Love, Your Son John
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house. I just
wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report
card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.
I could almost see my own kid doing something like this...  
__________________
testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
10-14-2007, 05:28 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in a land where men grow beards and women don't
Posts: 3,990
| |
__________________ Quote: |
Originally Posted by Luis Antonio ONLY RETARDED PEOPLE WRITE WITH CAPS ON. Good thing I press shift | Quote: |
Originally Posted by Luis Antonio Bah! Bunch of lamers! Ye need the lesson of the true powergamer: Play mages, name them Koffi Annan, and only use non-intervention spells! Buwahahahahah! | |
10-14-2007, 06:36 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: anywhere but in a normal existance
Posts: 380
| | | LMAO! makes me wonder if i would ever get a letter like that from my son when he gets to be that age. very very awesome!
__________________ Smile.... That way they wont know what your thinking  Quote:
Originally Posted by Tricky  I can't really tell if I can't read that because I'm too drunk or because you are. | Quote:
Originally Posted by Claudius Lets hope it was both of us  | |
10-15-2007, 06:22 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Law School library, Vermont, USA
Posts: 1,230
| | | Ha! Tastefully done DW!
My mommy always told me she drank because I was bad...
(joking- ha ha ha... laugh it up folks)
__________________
Custodia legis |
10-15-2007, 06:51 PM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Somewhere a man such as I exist.
Posts: 5,017
| | | Oh hell yeah, that was hilarious! I haven't laughed this hard in a LONG time. Thanks for sharing. |
10-17-2007, 10:04 PM
|  | Member | | Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 12
| | Daddy drinks because you cry. 
__________________
our beauty is
a branch of nancy's tree
scratching the shutter
of beth's window |
10-22-2007, 06:59 AM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 12
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Fahrenheit Daddy drinks because you cry. |  I met this before.. |
11-01-2007, 04:04 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 51
| | | This stirred something in my memory...
{LINE REMOVED}
__________________ Our name is Sinister for we are sinister! |
11-07-2007, 08:09 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Currently in Mid-word, on the path of the Beam
Posts: 149
| | | Hysterical.... It's sounds like something I would do.
__________________ Quote:
Originally Posted by Tricky I want the world to become more appreciative of carefully constructed spam. The art of saying absolutely nothing with many beautiful words is the closest you can get to poetry without meaning. That's life, really. Spagnificant. | The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed. |
11-07-2007, 09:41 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 1,387
| | | Wow, that was great. XD XD
__________________
"Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more: it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." |
11-08-2007, 09:37 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 1,319
| | | Why parents drink?
A morbid fear of dehydration. |
11-08-2007, 09:44 AM
| ![Loki[D.d.G]'s Avatar](http://www.gamebanshee.com/forums/image.php?u=43011&dateline=1194613349) | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Dreamscape and the Fugue Plane
Posts: 1,440
| | Ah, yes. The ugly monster finally rears its head. Without liquid, mankind can't survive. And what better liquid nourishment than good ol' alcohol. 
Thankfully both of my parents are fantastic and neither drink. Though my mom has a pretty low alcohol tolerance level. Couple of drops and she goes cross eyed and rosy cheeked.
__________________
Police arrested two teens today. One was drinking battery acid, and the other eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other off. |
11-11-2007, 08:18 PM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 10
| | | My father likes drinking.. |
11-11-2007, 08:30 PM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Dreamscape and the Fugue Plane
Posts: 1,440
| | Quote: |
My father likes drinking..
| Thats sad...
__________________
Police arrested two teens today. One was drinking battery acid, and the other eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other off. |
11-12-2007, 07:05 PM
|  | Member | | Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Harrisburg, Pa.
Posts: 33
| | | OMG, for a bunch of intelligent people, your some funny frs.
__________________
Ex tenebris lucem.
| | Thread Tools | | | | Display Modes | Rate This Thread |  Linear Mode | | 
Posting Rules
| You may not post new threads You may not post replies You may not post attachments You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off |
| | | |
