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02-02-2007, 08:17 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: nowheresville, minnesota
Posts: 472
| | | joke of the year
my math teacher told us this one today. its great  im changing some of the names so its funnier here.
DW, BS, and Fable all die. They're waiting to be judged to get into heaven, they're in a huge waiting room. Eventually over the intercom comes a voice, "*cshh* Bloodstalker, please go to room number 1. Bloodstalker, room 1. *cshh*" so BS nervously gets up and goes to room number 1. It's full of snakes. Inside the room an intercom says, "Bloodstalker, you have sinned. As a punishment, you must spend eternity with these snakes." DW and Fable are hearing this from outside, so they're a bit nervous. After a while, the intercom speaks up once again. "Dragon Wench, please report to room number 2." So she gets up and goes, nervously. She enters and the room is filled with tarantulas and scorpions. "Dragon Wench," the intercom blares, "You have sinned. As a punishment, you must spend eternity with these scorpions and tarantulas." Well, Fable still hears all this from outside. He's getting extremely nervous. Eventually, the intercom says, "Fable, please report to room number 3." He gets up, shaking, and goes in. Inside is Carmen Electra. She's looking pretty good. A voice comes over the intercom saying, "Carmen Electra, you have sinned..."
Sorry guys, but i had to tell the joke and you three were the perfect candidates for it. 
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When a few people die, it's a tragedy. When thousands do, it's a statistic.
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02-02-2007, 08:28 PM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Somewhere a man such as I exist.
Posts: 5,029
| | | Funny, but not the joke of the year, definitely not.
There are better jokes out there, but if they were posted here, the member who posted would be banned for sure. |
02-02-2007, 08:30 PM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: nowheresville, minnesota
Posts: 472
| | | then... forum-appropriate joke of the year?
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When a few people die, it's a tragedy. When thousands do, it's a statistic.
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02-02-2007, 08:39 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: Faraway, so close
Posts: 125
| | @Wing:  Very good, and you reminded me of another joke i'd like to post when I make the translation
@the appropriate mods: maybe this should go to "The humour redirect thread" in "Other entertainment", I posted a joke there on 22/1 and noone has added something since then and I wouldn't like to double-post
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"The neurosis and the madness of Robespierre or Baudelaire were much more fertile for humanity than the "health" of some "x" shopkeeper of that time." Cornelius Castoriadis(The Imaginary Institution of Society) |
02-02-2007, 09:59 PM
|  | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 18,002
| | LMAO! That's cute!
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testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
02-02-2007, 10:02 PM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Hell if I know
Posts: 15,232
| | You know, I could take this a lot of ways, but I'm gonna take it that I would be Carmen electra's idea of paradise
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Lord of Lurkers
Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell! |
02-02-2007, 10:09 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Alberta Canada
Posts: 323
| | | Ha, that made me giggle a tad.
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Add l Skinflute l (Lower case L's) if you think you can beat me 1v1 snipers in Halo 2.
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02-03-2007, 12:36 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: USA
Posts: 3,125
| | | Well, you know what Jean-Paul Sartre said: "Hell is other people."
Ever hear the joke about the Hindu, the rabbi, and the lawyer? |
02-03-2007, 02:10 AM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 154
| | | No I haven't, please go ahead. |
02-03-2007, 11:14 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: USA
Posts: 3,125
| | | A Hindu, a rabbi, and a lawyer were traveling together. It was getting late, so they had to stop for the night. They saw a farmhouse nearby, so they went to it and knocked on the door. The farmer greeted them and said he'd be glad to let them stay for the night, but there wasn't enough room in the house for all of them. One of them would have to sleep in the barn.
The Hindu said, "If one of us has to sleep in the barn, I'll do it. You two can sleep in the house." So he went to the barn.
A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. It was the Hindu. He said, "I'm sorry, but there is a cow in the barn. Cows are sacred in my religion, so I can't sleep there."
The rabbi said, "Don't worry about it. I'll sleep in the barn." So he went to the barn.
A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. It was the rabbi. He said, "I'm sorry, but there is a pig in the barn. Pigs are not kosher in my religion, so I can't sleep there."
The lawyer said, "Oh, alright. I'll sleep in the barn." So he went to the barn.
A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. It was the cow and the pig.  |
02-03-2007, 12:35 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Home of the straw men
Posts: 907
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by VonDondu  A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. It was the cow and the pig. | I see lawyers still have a high standing in society over there. Ever considered trying the pied piper trick? Take an ambulance, drive it around the city with sirens on to catch all the cruising lawyers and then run it over a cliff. Should work.
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The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations David Friedman |
02-03-2007, 03:41 PM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: nowheresville, minnesota
Posts: 472
| | come on fable, what do you think? i heard DW and BS's thoughts, what about you?
@Vondon
nice
and yes, hell=people
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When a few people die, it's a tragedy. When thousands do, it's a statistic.
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02-05-2007, 05:41 PM
| | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 18,002
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by wing come on fable, what do you think? i heard DW and BS's thoughts, what about you? | Maybe Fable doesn't want to comment on being somebody's definition of punishment.... I think he's trying to avoid new additions to his fan club 
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testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
02-05-2007, 06:01 PM
| | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Hell if I know
Posts: 15,232
| | Maybe he's just too busy giving Carmen Hell 
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Lord of Lurkers
Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell! |
02-05-2007, 06:08 PM
|  | Temporarily on Leave | | Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: The sun, the moon, and the stars.
Posts: 28,399
| | Bah. I'm gone for 3 days, and look what happens. 
Besides, all rumors about Carmen Electra, myself, a bubble bath and several bottles of beaujolais are completely unfounded.
Cindy Crawford, on the other hand...
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