Dating 101

[Tricky]

I am really that transparent, aren't I?

[Cuchulain82]

Originally Posted by Tricky

I am really that transparent, aren't I?

You don't get 850 posts on a game board for nuthin' right?!

(*zing* It was a joke... moving on)

You're not that transparent, it's just that this is garden variety stuff. Really. Girls are generally just as nervous about this as you are (at least, I think so- any girls out there, please chime in). At least you have to societal burden of asking the girl out and starting the first contact, which also means you have a little control. You can do what you want, and if you like a girl, then you should do something about it.

Dating takes effort. You have to be proactive and do stuff that you otherwise wouldn't do. This includes getting exercise and not playing WoW for days on end. It also includes cleaning your space, making yourself presentable, spending money on dinner, etc. But, like anything else that requires effort, usually there is some reward. I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years (today, actually- how appropriate!) and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I just like her company, and we have a great time together. We got together originally as a fling, and for the first few years we knew each other we hated each other. Then something changed, this led to that, and the rest is, as they say, history.

I am a former fat kid who spent most of my teenaged years playing D&D and videogames. If I can find a girl then anyone can! You just gotta try.

[Tricky]

Thanks, appreciated.

Well, my social circle has shrunk a lot over the last five years, so I do sometimes feel I'm in a less favourable position to find a love like that again. My brother sometimes teases me by mailing me links to dating services. Then again, he's a lot older than I am and never even had a real relationship.

Oh well.

[Chanak]

Originally Posted by dragon wench

*When starting to become intimate, remember, the socks should always be removed first.

Exception: unless wearing socks whilst being intimate is a fetish. Good sign that someone has a sock fetish: they wear "toed" socks.

*Unless you are sure somebody shares your "hobbies" do not leave fetishistic toys scattered around your home if you plan on inviting the person in later.

Exception: one might wish to leave such devices scattered around one's home in order to gauge the response of a potential intimate partner, especially if an intimate partner who shares an interest in such devices is desired.

*Men, do not wear more socks than required by any other normal occasion, women do notice such discrepancies. Equally, women, do not wear padded bras or misuse Kleenex, the same principle applies.

Exception: see my responses above. Men: wear interesting socks if the prospective intimate partner seems to exhibit sock fetish traits. Padded bras or kleenex: hmmm, not sure why a female would do that, unless a prospective partner with a large-breast fetish is desired. In that case, a padded or kleenex-stuffed bra doesn't serve the purpose very well.

More?

Yes. My contribution:

* Never let your desire for dating override your limitations. Don't pursue nor tolerate a boorish dating prospect...unless they are exceptionally wealthy and generous with said wealth. Looks do not matter in any case.

* Consider broadening your areas of interest and knowledge, and make efforts to investigate a variety of subjects. This way, you'll be armed to engage in interesting conversation, which scores the highest points (yep, even more than looks). General rule: conversations about sports are a no-no, unless your date is obviously a sports fanatic. Same applies to gaming, too.

unless he or she is a rabid gamer

* Develop your communcation skills. It's not all about the way you speak. Learn the subtle art of thoughfully placed smiles, somber facial expressions, and quizzical eyebrow raising. Use eye contact with your date judiciously: you want to make eye contact frequently...but avoid staring. That tends to make others uncomfortable and may give you a creepy air about yourself. Practice in front of a mirror. In short, learn how to act.

Addendum: Guys: don't get caught staring at a woman's physical attributes. Be slick about it. Learn from females in this regard: they are slick about the oogling they do. You need to be slick too.

* Establish what you want and stick with it. Try to be realistic in those expectations and remember to allow others to be human in meeting them - meaning give 'em some slack. A demanding, controlling person is a huge turn-off. It's one thing for a date to be late now and then: that's normal. It's another for them to be persistently late, supplying a variety of excuses in the process. Only excuse to be persistently late: they're a physician or police officer. They have an excuse. If your date is a lawyer: no excuse whatsoever. Lawyers have no excuse.

[Lady Dragonfly]

Padded bras or kleenex: hmmm, not sure why a female would do that, unless a prospective partner with a large-breast fetish is desired. In that case, a padded or kleenex-stuffed bra doesn't serve the purpose very well.

To my embarassment, I have to admit that I was actually wondering what DW meant by "misusing kleenex" before you spelled it out, Chanak. Gosh, and I am not even blonde.

A question to all dating specialists here:

Is it OK to do all these gross things you listed on two pages to a person who is not your date? I mean all bean/garlic/domination/not-taking-shower?

[Fiberfar]

Originally Posted by Lady Dragonfly

Is it OK to do all these gross things you listed on two pages to a person who is not your date? I mean all bean/garlic/domination/not-taking-shower?

Depends on the people around you. I mean... "When in rome...." must certainly apply to this as well.

"When around pigs, behave like pigs"

Edit: Or you can be real smooth and be a gentleman around a lot of pigs xD

[Chanak]

Originally Posted by Fiberfar

Edit: Or you can be real smooth and be a gentleman around a lot of pigs xD

That is the rule. It only helps you look better. That is a good thing.

Also, the same thing applies when in the company of inebriated individuals. Remain sober and cognizant so when the buffoonery begins, you appear debonair, collected, and obviously appalled by the goings-on. Perhaps in the process you will net yourself a date. You appear sane in a crowd of lunatics: that might attract the woman that one of your sloshed associates has been artlessly leering at, drooling over, etc.

[dragon wench]

Originally Posted by Chanak

That is the rule. It only helps you look better. That is a good thing.

Also, the same thing applies when in the company of inebriated individuals. Remain sober and cognizant so when the buffoonery begins, you appear debonair, collected, and obviously appalled by the goings-on. Perhaps in the process you will net yourself a date. You appear sane in a crowd of lunatics: that might attract the woman that one of your sloshed associates has been artlessly leering at, drooling over, etc.

This sounds like the beginnings of some evil master plan....
Surround yourself with a troop of unwitting baboons... persuade them to go to a bar with you... while you remain sober and observe their lecherous antics around any number of fair damsels... as you plot your next move

[Lady Dragonfly]

You appear sane in a crowd of lunatics: that might attract the woman that one of your sloshed associates has been artlessly leering at, drooling over, etc.

Surround yourself with a troop of unwitting baboons... persuade them to go to a bar with you... while you remain sober and observe their lecherous antics around any number of fair damsels... as you plot your next move

What if the damsels in question are Kleenex-padded, drunk, have been snacking on beans and cabbage the whole day, and forgot to take shower? (Who else would be lounging in a bar among lunatics and unwitting baboons, anyway).

[Vicsun]

Originally Posted by Lady Dragonfly

What if the damsels in question are Kleenex-padded, drunk, have been snacking on beans and cabbage the whole day, and forgot to take shower? (Who else would be lounging in a bar among lunatics and unwitting baboons, anyway).

Girls aren't like that

Girls are wonderful creatures that smell nice and don't poop.

[Fiberfar]

Originally Posted by Lady Dragonfly

(Who else would be lounging in a bar among lunatics and unwitting baboons, anyway).

The Russ!

Russ - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

17 days of rocking, drinking and well.... lots of chlamydia.

[Chanak]

Originally Posted by dragon wench

This sounds like the beginnings of some evil master plan....
Surround yourself with a troop of unwitting baboons... persuade them to go to a bar with you... while you remain sober and observe their lecherous antics around any number of fair damsels... as you plot your next move

Right. One should always have some sort of Master Plan at play, mindful of opportunities. Seize the day.

A dime looks mighty appealing in a pile of pennies. One needn't be a Casanova, but could appear like Don Juan amongst a crowd of Don Quioxtes.

@LadyD: I find it highly unlikely one would find bean eating, cabbage eating, kleenex padding, and lack of a shower all present in a given female, but of course I admit to the possibility of being mistaken.

[Moonbiter]

Originally Posted by Chanak

@LadyD: I find it highly unlikely one would find bean eating, cabbage eating, kleenex padding, and lack of a shower all present in a given female, but of course I admit to the possibility of being mistaken.

You haven't visited many roadhouses, have you? Or English football pubs? No? How about Irish pubs in Spain? You know the places with the plastic leprechauns and the cheesy "rural tavern" decor? You should, if you want to meet that kind of ladies. Still, I'll take a Kansas roadhouse anytime.

Some advices for both sexes:

*If you intend to get laid, do NOT wear your lucky boxers with dinosaurs and tiny spaceships on them. The giggling will never stop.

*A big bra under a strapless dress is not the way to the heart of a man of class & style. The dress is strapless for a reason.

*Don't get tattoos. The 90s are over. You will get old. Girls, especially not on your lower back. If I wanted reading material while I'm visiting, I would have brought a book.

*If you go to a five star restaurant and your date wants ketchup: Go to the bathroom and escape out the window!

*If the waiter asks what you want to drink with your meal, do not order a double Jack Daniels straight.

*If she has made you a fancy homecooked meal that tastes like roadkill in Cool Aid, eat it all! You will get lucky.

*Don't "run out of gas." It doesn't work anymore. They're on to us.

*Don't talk work.

*Don't talk sports.

*Do not use cologne "Downstairs" on a first date.

*Bring 2 condoms, not 20.

*She might be a militant feminist who chews tobacco and rolls her own tampons, but it's an indisputable fact that all females need a little pampering.

*He might be a poncy metrosexual turnip who recites poetry and knows his way around skin creams, but it's an indisputable fact that all males need to feel male once in awhile.

[Chanak]

Originally Posted by Moonbiter

You haven't visited many roadhouses, have you? Or English football pubs? No? How about Irish pubs in Spain? You know the places with the plastic leprechauns and the cheesy "rural tavern" decor? You should, if you want to meet that kind of ladies. Still, I'll take a Kansas roadhouse anytime.

And why would I wish to visit such an establishment, unless it was to work on my zoological thesis?

I might cave in one day and and hit one of those places south of the border, when I finally realize that self-flagellation is the only cure for my horrible karma.

*She might be a militant feminist who chews tobacco and rolls her own tampons...

*He might be a poncy metrosexual turnip who recites poetry and knows his way around skin creams...

They both fight crime.

That *had* to be said.

[Ode to a Grasshopper]

Originally Posted by Moonbiter

*Don't get tattoos. The 90s are over. You will get old. Girls, especially not on your lower back. If I wanted reading material while I'm visiting, I would have brought a book.

I like women with tattoos, especially on their lower back...