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04-16-2002, 01:33 AM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Hell if I know
Posts: 15,240
| | | BS's jouney thru SYM's tunnels ISO love Hunched over a table in a dimly lit cluttered room, Bs looks over the map he has pieced together from various sources.The time has come to put his plans into effect. The months of tunnelling are almost completed, and according to his map, he need only to dig up at the end odf the tunnel to find the female companionship he craves. Whistleing a happy tune, he puts his best $3.00 suit on, splashes on some "I'm a manly studmuffin" aftershave and sets of down the tunnel.
His thoughts are excited as he breaks the surface, his heart beating with anticipation. Suddenly, a blast of frigid air greets him. Something is not quite right it seems, the object of his affection doesn't live in a cold climate. He peeks his head through the floor and lookas around in amazement.
The entire room is made out of ice. A true to life igloo, he sudenly realizes. Mounds of discarded textbooks litter the floor, obviously underused. There is no light save the light from a computer screen sitting at the desk. The light is dim, but more than enough to make out a figure sitting before the screen. A most disturbing figure.
A young man is sitting there, eyes vacant, fingers flying across the keyboard.Upon the figures head there is a paper crown, cutout unevenly and stapled together, with the words "King of Spam" written in crayon. A towel is tied around the figures neck, no doubt a royal cape. The figure is only clad otherwise in a huge diaper...no, wait....it is a loinclothe!!!! Even more disturbing is the huge novelty beard that is superglued to the figures face. Suddenly, the figure begins to rock back and forth and speak in backwards Yoda talk, muttering and addressing himself as I Sage. Damn his information, this isn't his desrtination, this is Aegis's igloo.
BS mumbles curses under his breath about unreliable sources and lowers himself back down the tunnel, just as Aegis tries to levitate from his chair, falling with a none to graceful thud to the floor. Shineing his light on the map, BS see's where he made the wrong turn.
Whistleing happily to himself, he puts the image out of his mind and proceeds to his next destination along the tunnels................................ 
__________________ Lord of Lurkers Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell! | 
04-16-2002, 01:37 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Fremantle, Australia
Posts: 6,251
| | Quote:
Originally posted by BS Hunched over a table in a dimly lit cluttered room, Bs looks over the map he has pieced together from various sources.The time has come to put his plans into effect. The months of tunnelling are almost completed, and according to his map, he need only to dig up at the end odf the tunnel to find the female companionship he craves. Whistleing a happy tune, he puts his best $3.00 suit on, splashes on some "I'm a manly studmuffin" aftershave and sets of down the tunnel.<snip>
| If you try some "I'm a manly studpuffin" aftershave I'm sure Foul would be happy to help you out... 
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04-16-2002, 03:47 AM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: London, UK.
Posts: 4,574
| | Good one BS.
I shudder to think where your subterranean travels will lead you next. I'm installing seismic detection devices and an iron plate on the floor. (PS I live on the third storey  ) | 
04-16-2002, 08:51 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Soviet Canuckistan
Posts: 13,431
| | ROFL!  That was god BS. | 
04-16-2002, 09:58 AM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: In the Batcave with catwoman. *prrrr*
Posts: 4,857
| | | LOL BS!
Perhaps he'll end up in KiD's bunker next!
(In a bunker, underneath YOUR house. etc)
__________________ Guinness is good for you. Gives you strength. | 
04-16-2002, 10:41 AM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Hell if I know
Posts: 15,240
| | Making his way throught the tunnels, BS's anticipation begins to heighten. It won't be long now before he comes upon his object of desire. he halts at the end of ne particularly long tunnel, looking up at the floor he must break through. No mistakes this time. He has checked his map twice, and this is the jackpot.
as he beaks through the surface, he peers around the room. Something is odd, not quite right. this doesn't look like....then he starts to take in details.
On the floor, there are several editions of "Pinky and the Brain's Guide to World Domination" . One book is open to the table of contents, and each chapter has been crossed out, evidently all tried and failed. Judging by the ntes scribbled, the owner of the books feels as though he has been backstabbed and betrayed. Pictures of Waverly and Foul, with little darts embedded in the images, line the walls. a wadded up COMM poster is in the waste basket,A weird looking machine is in the corner, a device of foul desructive qualities, no doubt, this is the legendary Behemouth Breaker of Boards, and finally his eyes settle on the lone person in the room.
In front of the computer, eyes glowing with a strange light, he hears the words as the man speaks. "Yes Preciousss, they takes you away from us, tries to keep you for themselves they does. But soon, my Precious, soo, we will have you back, oh yes, My precious, soon, we will come for you. Then we make nasty little SYMians pay, yes, pay for stealing from poor Weasel."
A rant follows, as Weasel liberally spreads blame around to everyone, most promenintly Flagg, and Waverly. Then he grins maniacally, and begins reading a new book, 1001 ways to win a Goddess of wisdom. Suddenly, he rises and actually begins to enter his computer. Amazing. Moments later, he returns, his body covered in various traps and wrapped in barb wire, as he curses thos anti- weasel devices his precious is protected by.
Lowering himself back into the tunnels, BS wonders who this "Precious" is, but the only clues he could obtain are something about a hill and the mediterranian. Oh well, a temporary setback.
he examines the map again.....ahhh, he has been reading it upside down. cursing his luck, he turns the map right side up and begins to head back through the tunnels. This time, there cam be no mistake........................... 
__________________ Lord of Lurkers Guess what? I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell! | 
04-16-2002, 10:46 AM
|  | Engorged Member | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Abingdon, UK
Posts: 5,152
| | ROFL BS, keep it up 
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04-16-2002, 10:52 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: The Boundaries of Chaos and Infinity
Posts: 291
| | Where will next BS turn up, stay tuned next time on the Tales of fabulous wonderful super BS.
Pretty damn funny BS, you old hermit you. 
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I care not for endings or beginnings, but for the eternal and infinite spaces of the universe, and for the endless exploration of eternity, and mysteries which I will find plumbing the infinite depths.
"Do not turn inward to find peace and wisdom, turn outward instead to find liberation from the narrow boundaries of self", quote from Gary Paul Nabhan, paraphrased of course
"When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong" quote from Arthur C. Clarke, thought it was interesting.
Tips on living longer: eat right, exercise, and yes castrate yourself, eunuchs live longer then normal people.
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04-16-2002, 10:54 AM
|  | Moderator | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: London, UK.
Posts: 4,574
| | This is like a couple of episodes of Quantam leap where Sam Beckett appears in a woman's body, except with Bloodstalker its, um, well, you know.. like a couple of episodes of Quantam leap where he's in a woman's body.  | 
04-16-2002, 11:02 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Valinor
Posts: 3,863
| | It's times like these I wish my house were built on stilts.
Good work BS 
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Then darkness took me, and I strayed out of thought and time
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04-16-2002, 11:04 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Klah
Posts: 1,715
| | Quote: Originally posted by AbysmalNature Where will next BS turn up, stay tuned next time on the Tales of fabulous wonderful super BS.
Pretty damn funny BS, you old hermit you. | Wow, you've become SUPER BS!! Able to down yards in a single gulp.....Can leer drunkenly at women at will......Skip out on bar tabs in a flash.... 
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04-16-2002, 11:18 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
Posts: 3,898
| | @BS : ROFLMAO ! Great !
Keep at it , I can't wait to read the sequel(s) ....
No worries,
Beldin 
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So he kills kittens? Nothing to fear about that. (CM about Foul on SYM)
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"Nevermore."
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04-16-2002, 11:54 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Strana Mechti
Posts: 5,690
| | OMG ! A tunnelling BS Well I doubt he can tunnel into my bunker since it's all made by titanium  But If he does I hope he brings what I asked
Keep up the good work BS 
__________________ "Chikara wa seigyo dekiru kedo, sore ni, tayoru tsumori wa nai." "I can control my power but I have no intention of relying on it." "Is there anything you want, anything at all. Come to me, I'll be your guardian angel" | 
04-16-2002, 11:57 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The Lake Isle of Innisfree
Posts: 3,054
| | BS: Very good work !!!  | 
04-16-2002, 12:37 PM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Spanking Witch King
Posts: 1,991
| | | Good one BS--best thing since the hermit cabin....
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