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10-22-2005, 11:19 AM
|  | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 17,997
| |  101 Reasons to Remain Sober (spam on topic only)
Yes, I'm serious. It would be no challenge around here to ask people to list reasons why they should remain inebriated, so I decided to go for something slightly different  Note: Please try to keep your responses within the "spirit" (or lack thereof ) of this thread, I don't want to be responsible for encouraging post farming 
To Start:
1. You have far less chance of calling out the wrong name during sex
2. You are unlikely to pass out in the middle of a busy intersection while stumbling home
3. You won't mistake your pet for a human companion
4. You won't need to worship at the porcelain alter every Saturday and Sunday morning
5. You are less likely to wake up next to somebody you don't know (and wish you didn't know) wondering exactly what happened the night before.
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testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain.
Last edited by dragon wench; 10-22-2005 at 11:23 AM.
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10-22-2005, 11:21 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Near Dallas, Texas
Posts: 767
| | 6. Not coming on to a cop when you get pulled over. (Especially same sex cop...) 
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"To fight and conquer in all your battles is not supreme excellence; supreme excellence consists in breaking the enemy's resistance without fighting."
-Sun Tzu, the Art of War |
10-22-2005, 11:22 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Hell Freezing Over
Posts: 7,763
| | Quote: |
1. You have far less chance of calling out the wrong name during sex
| Quote: |
3. You won't mistake your pet for a human companion
| Oh, Fido!
Im spot, you moron!
I think I will refrain from posting in this thread... I would not be able to contain myself, considering the path this thread has already taken... 
This was already extremely naughty from the start... *shakes head*
I think you should include a warning in the first post. For over 14 year olds only.
__________________ Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt HERE! Sabre's site for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling. |
10-22-2005, 11:28 AM
| | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 17,997
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by Hill-Shatar Oh, Fido!
Im spot, you moron!
I think I will refrain from posting in this thread... I would not be able to contain myself, considering the path this thread has already taken...
This was already extremely naughty from the start... *shakes head*
I think you should include a warning in the first post. For over 14 year olds only. | ROFLMAO!
Erm.. by that classification, most of the threads in SYM should come with such a warning
7. You won't think *you* are the family pet
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testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
10-22-2005, 11:30 AM
|  | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Soviet Canuckistan
Posts: 13,431
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by dragon wench ROFLMAO!
Erm.. by that classification, most of the threads in SYM should come with such a warning
7. You won't think *you* are the family pet | 8. Your wallet will remain much heavier |
10-22-2005, 11:30 AM
|  | Banned | | Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: There
Posts: 4,139
| | | 9. Less chance of having sex with a family member. (disclaimer does not work in the southern united states)
10. You wont kill the bushes in your front yard.
11. less clean up around the house. |
10-22-2005, 11:35 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Hell Freezing Over
Posts: 7,763
| | | 12. You will end up at the right house on Friday nights.
__________________ Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt HERE! Sabre's site for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling. |
10-22-2005, 11:35 AM
| | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 17,997
| | | 13. You won't be calling up NASA to tell them about the "Little Green Men" who keep on appearing in the corner of your living room
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testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
10-22-2005, 11:38 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Hell Freezing Over
Posts: 7,763
| | | 14. The police won't have to respond to calls of a person running down the street yelling "they're after me, they're after me!"
__________________ Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt HERE! Sabre's site for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling. |
10-22-2005, 11:39 AM
|  | Banned | | Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Chasing nuns out in the yard
Posts: 4,613
| | 15. You won't have to worship the toilet as your savior and god.
16. You won't get beaten up by your friends for rooting against your hometown football team.
17. You won't wake up in the bed of someone you've never seen before and have to frantically go through their medicine cabinet looking for a bottle with their name on it.
Naturally I've never partaken in any of these activities myself  ... |
10-22-2005, 11:42 AM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Hell Freezing Over
Posts: 7,763
| | @ tony: Priceless. Welcome to SYM.
18. You wear female underwear on purpose.
19. Not giggling whenever you slam into a wall the door has disapeared from.
20. The bar tender does not look like Pamela Anderson.
21. No chance fo you accidentally hitting on friends.
(not me, of course...)
__________________ Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt HERE! Sabre's site for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling.
Last edited by Hill-Shatar; 10-22-2005 at 11:59 AM.
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10-22-2005, 12:29 PM
| | Moderator and Twisted Sister | | Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: The maelstrom where chaos merges with lucidity
Posts: 17,997
| | | 22. Less chance of trolling Internet forums and mistaking your sister/brother for that cute poster you've had your eyes on..
__________________
testingtest12Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
testingtest12.......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain. |
10-22-2005, 12:32 PM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: There
Posts: 4,139
| | | 23. not mistaking DW for that cute poster youve had ur eyes on. |
10-22-2005, 12:37 PM
| | Exalted Member | | Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Hell Freezing Over
Posts: 7,763
| | 24. Not having extremely disturbing dreams the night after.
25. Not using up that entire bottle of tylenol in one go.
__________________ Buy a GameBanshee T-Shirt HERE! Sabre's site for Baldur's Gate series' patches and items. This has been a Drive-by Hilling. |
10-22-2005, 12:42 PM
| | Banned | | Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: There
Posts: 4,139
| | | 26. not mistaking your couch for your girlfriends
27. no mistkaing your girlfriend for your couch
28. not mistaking your girlfriends poodle for a towel
29.not mistaking your girlfriends parents chiuaua for toilet paper.
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