| Best items:
Any kind of weapon is suitable, but Crom Faeyr and Celestial Fury make a lethal dual-wield combination. Damage-reducing off-hand weapons such as Defender of Easthaven are nice. You can use Belm as an off-hand weapon to get an extra attack with your primary weapon. The Improved Mace of Disruption +2 will make short work of liches and other undead creatures. The Amulet of Power is almost indispensable. I like the Belt of Inertial Barrier, but the Girdles of Giant Strength are also nice. Bards can't wear helms, but the Mask of King Strohm will protect against critical hits, and there are some Ioun stones in Throne of Bhaal. Melodic Chain, Jester's Chain, and Bladesinger are obviously some of the best armors for a Bard, but whatever you choose, you don't want to disable spellcasting. I prefer the Ring of Gaxx and the Ring of Free Action, but if you're playing solo, the Ring of Regeneration is also nice. You can use almost any kind of boots and bracers you find. You can use almost any kind of cloak you find, but I like the Cloak of the Sewers and the Cloak of Mirroring the best, or the Cloak of Non-Detection. If you want to use a buckler (you can't use a full-size shield), there's a +1 Buckler in Maevar's Guildhall.
Also note that you can use wands and scrolls.
If you install Throne of Bhaal, you can acquire Use Any Item, which will give you all sorts of options, including shields, helms, Mage items (like the Ring of Acuity or the Robe of Vecna), etc. You can also acquire the Enhanced Bard Song, which will help even if you're playing solo (just use Mislead or the Helm of Vhailor).
Best spells:
Melf's Minute Meteors works very well combined with Offensive Spin, even at 8th Level. It's not as impressive as Energy Blades combined with Critical Strike, but those are High Level Abilities, after all.
1st Level: Magic Missile and Spook. Grease can also help, especially if you have the Ring of Free Action.
2nd Level: Mirror Image, Detect Invisibility, Glitterdust, Horror (if you don't have the innate ability), Resist Fear, Web (you can make some nice "traps")
3rd Level: Melf's Minute Meteors, Skull Trap (I use them like hand grenades), Detect Illusion, Fireball (or use a Wand of Fire), Flame Arrow, Remove Magic
4th Level: Stoneskin and Improved Invisibility are the best. Confusion, Emotion, and Teleport Field all serve pretty much the same purpose. Greater Malison, Fireshield, and Secret Word are useful. Wizard Eye can be used as a decoy if you like cheese.
5th Level: All of the 5th Level spells are nice, although I hardly ever use Oracle, Minor Spell Turning, and Phantom Blade.
6th Level: You get a very limited number of spell slots. Improved Haste and Mislead are probably worth the most mileage, but the other spells are also useful, depending on the situation and your playing style (which is true of ALL spells). The Death Spell really comes in handy if you're up against summoned creatures or illithids, umber hulks, lower-level vampires, hordes of little monsters, etc. Conjured Fire Elementals will tear up monsters that can't hit creatures that are immune to +2 weapons (their own fists are treated as +4 weapons).  | 
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