As you say,
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Portray the fear and frustration people have to endure when a conflict breaks out in the game world. How they wished for everything to be back to normal once again. Another way is to present the realities of war through the eyes of the main character. How he/she feels regarding the war, the things he's done and his reaction towards the death of his/her comrades.
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It is all about how NPC display their attitude and alignment, not the reality of war per se, IMO. I think all of that is generally present in RPG to some extent. Can you name a game that severely lacks this feature?