Quote:
Have you read Donna Tartt's first novel "The secret history?". In this novel, the narrator says:
"I suppose at one time in my life I might have had any number of stories, but now there is no other. This is the only story I will ever be able to tell."
This is of course an authors way of expressing it in a literary way and a way that is aimed at creating tension and interest for the story that is to come, but to me, it is also a good description of the destructive power of occupation with things that people have not managed to work through properly and leave behind.
For the vast majority of people, guilt, shame, sorrow, trauma, severe emotional pain and/or stress, everything, is much easier to cope with and work through if you have a good social network. If you have to express your feelings or tell your "secrets" in a way that does not even include communication, your social support must be very, very insufficient.
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Yes, I have read that novel... And I think you are right in your analogy. Indeed, from what I've experienced personally and from what I know of others, not dealing head on with things like guilt, sorrow etc. causes problems that are manifested in both physical and mental/emotional health. Or, as in the case of Tartt's novel....utter destruction of community and self.
.... I can't imagine pouring out deeply personal things in a manner that does not involve some kind of real response or reciprocation. I only do things like that (such as writing poetry or writing in my journal) if something is just too painful and personal to discuss even with my closest friends. And, I really sense the difference too. If I'm simply writing for myself, to somehow spew it out, sure there's a level of relief. But, it really is not the same as sharing with another human being.
Yet, I have friends with whom I can share and discuss...
To not be able to do so... I suspect that people in the field have only just started to scratch the surface of how terribly destructive social isolation like this can be.