Things a Morrowind NPC would never actually say

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fable
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Things a Morrowind NPC would never actually say

Postby fable » Mon May 17, 2004 7:47 pm

An ordinator: "Hey, nice armor! You get that from one of the boys? Right! Care to do lunch?"

A dremora: "No, don't mind me. Go right ahead and steal from my shrine. I mean, that's what it's here for, right? You never come by for any other reason, you never call..."
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.

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unregisturd
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Postby unregisturd » Mon May 17, 2004 9:09 pm

Head of a guild: "Crap! I think I just pooped my pants!"
Like that?
Golden Saint: "Does this helmet make me look fat?"
I'm an xboxer.

"In case I don't make it... *dun dun dun* ...tell my dad... *dun dun dun* ...he's weird."

I never took the time to stop and realize that death takes many forms... even while alive.

Obi Wan Kenobi is one hot Jedi.

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dragon wench
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Postby dragon wench » Mon May 17, 2004 9:23 pm

Golden Saint: "Yet another intrepid fool wanting to steal my soul, why must I perpetually suffer such imbeciles?"
[SPOILER]testingtest12[/SPOILER][SIZE="1"]Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

[SPOILER]testingtest12[/SPOILER][color="Silver"].......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain.[/size][/color]

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fable
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Postby fable » Mon May 17, 2004 9:26 pm

Lord Vivec: "Hey, Smilin' Joe Vivec, here! And have I got some previously owned guars to show you...!"
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.

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dragon wench
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Postby dragon wench » Mon May 17, 2004 10:16 pm

Ogrim: "Hey puny adventurer stop laughing at my size, I'm just big-boned!"
[SPOILER]testingtest12[/SPOILER][SIZE="1"]Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

[SPOILER]testingtest12[/SPOILER][color="Silver"].......All those moments ... will be lost ... in time ... like tears in rain.[/size][/color]

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Monolith
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Postby Monolith » Tue May 18, 2004 9:25 am

Any NPC: "Dude, can you show me the way to a toilet or some thick bushes?" ;)

Seyda Neen's Tax Collector: "( put in here anything you want)" :p
"Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy in a jar on my desk."
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Gwalchmai
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Postby Gwalchmai » Tue May 18, 2004 9:30 am

Any NPC, panicked: "Where have all the children gone?"

Any NPC: "I just want to go home and go to bed.... Why must I continually walk around out here?"
That there; exactly the kinda diversion we coulda used.

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Monolith
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Postby Monolith » Tue May 18, 2004 9:33 am

Originally posted by Gwalchmai
Any NPC, panicked: "Where have all the children gone?"

Any NPC: "I just want to go home and go to bed.... Why must I continually walk around out here?"


LOL two things I wanted to add, too.

Any Guild-Master: "I wanted to send you to the other side of Vvardenfell...but hey, I'm not such an a**. Get me a cup of coffee and that's it..."
"Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy in a jar on my desk."
-Stephen King

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fable
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Postby fable » Tue May 18, 2004 9:35 am

Archmagister Gothren: "Hi, I'm not Gothren of House Telvanni, but I play him on tv. If like me, you suffer from the daily pain of arthritis, then consider buying..."
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.

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lifeishell91
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Postby lifeishell91 » Tue May 18, 2004 10:07 am

Flame Artronach: AAAAAAHHHH!!!! I'M ON FIRE!!!!!

:D :D :D

Any NPC: Now where can I get a nice hot cup of coffee? Oh, wait, they havn't been invented yet...oops.

:D :D :D

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irish37130
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Postby irish37130 » Tue May 18, 2004 10:16 am

Any NPC--"Well, ya see Timmy, We in VVerdenfall have the best Community Watch Program of all. We NEVER go to bed. We just keep an eye out for thieves all day and all night."

Usually followed with, "Hey man, where's that Khajit when I need him. I can't stay awake any longer without some more good moon sugar!"

Any guild master to another, "Oh good, another adventurer ready to walk across the continent doing jobs that Fed Ex would find humiliating. I bet I can get him to do something more stupid than you!"

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Monolith
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Postby Monolith » Tue May 18, 2004 10:37 am

Yea, looks like I'm the trend setter in this thread ;) :p

Vivec to a guard: "I bet you've never touched a divinity befor, have you? Want to scrub my back?"
"Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy in a jar on my desk."
-Stephen King

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fable
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Postby fable » Tue May 18, 2004 10:49 am

Arrille: "Sorry, we're closed, today. My son's bar mitzvah."

(Hope I spelt that right!)
To the Righteous belong the fruits of violent victory. The rest of us will have to settle for warm friends, warm lovers, and a wink from a quietly supportive universe.

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Locutus
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Postby Locutus » Tue May 18, 2004 10:55 am

Fargoth: Im strait...no really, I AM..... :D
Finding the world in the smallnes of the grain of sand
And holding infinities in the palm of your hand
And Heaven's realms in the seedling of this tiny flower
And eternities in the space of a single hour.

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lifeishell91
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Postby lifeishell91 » Tue May 18, 2004 11:35 am

Originally posted by Locutus
Fargoth: Im strait...no really, I AM..... :D


Sorry Locutus but that was kinda mean. I mean you pretty much insulted all gay guys in this forum :( And thats just pretty damn low.

And no, this isn't a joke :rolleyes:

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lifeishell91
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Postby lifeishell91 » Tue May 18, 2004 11:43 am

Daedroth:

"NO I'm not really an alligator, please no, don't turn me into a handbag or a pair of shoes...no...please...NO! AHH!!"
*Dies of Trauma*

LOL! :D

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irish37130
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Postby irish37130 » Tue May 18, 2004 12:07 pm

"You know what this countryside needs? More cliffracers!"

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Sarrin Khane
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Postby Sarrin Khane » Tue May 18, 2004 12:33 pm

Casius Cosades "Who took my shirt?"

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Postby Fer'or » Tue May 18, 2004 12:47 pm

Any NPC: "If only my parents teached me how to handle a doorknob."

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Postby tabooey » Tue May 18, 2004 1:00 pm

"I spoke to Michael Eisner about that new Red Mountain water park..."

"The new issue of PlayOrc just hit the stands!!!
Somebody set up us the bomb!!!
All your base are belong to us...